To Love is To Let Go

Love is both salvation and torment.

If Bella Ramsey were given another chance, she swore—she would never fall in love with Seth Rogan again.

The one thing Bella Ramsey regretted most in life was falling in love with her late father's friend.

She was ten the first time she met Seth Rogan—a tall man who held the newly orphaned girl in his arms and promised to protect her for the rest of his life.

He adopted her, raised her, and treated her like a real uncle.

At fifteen, when Bella was being bullied, it was Seth who showed up and made her tormentors kneel and apologize.

At eighteen, when one of Seth's missions failed and he was on the brink of death, Bella ignored the doctors' warnings and donated part of her liver to save him.

That same day, she stole a kiss from him, only for Seth to wake up at that very moment and see it happen.

There was no sweetness, only shock in his eyes—and a distance that never seemed to close.

Later, when Seth's one true love, Faye Walters, was critically ill, Bella was the only compatible donor.

The usually aloof Seth came to her then. He said that if she agreed to donate her kidney, he would do anything she asked.

Bella gave no reply. Her silence was her refusal. Faye died on the operating table.

Seth didn't shed a single tear. Life continued as if nothing had happened.

But on the seventh day after Faye's death, Seth made Bella's diary—filled with the secret longings of her teenage years—public.

He nailed her to a pillar of shame for loving her uncle.

On Bella's birthday, Seth drugged and kidnapped her. She was assaulted.

He stood by and watched, saying only, "Don't even think I'd touch you. You disgust me."

Just before she lost consciousness, Seth threw a bucket of cold water on her.

Dazed, she saw him walking toward her, knife in hand.

Then came the blade, swift and cold as ice. "This is what you owe Faye."

When she opened her eyes again, Bella found herself back on the day he had asked her for the kidney.

…

"I'm begging you. This kidney might mean nothing to you, but without it, Faye will die. If you agree to donate it to her, I'll do anything you ask."

Seth's pleading voice rang in her ears, snapping Bella fully awake.

She had come back to life.

In her past life, she had turned him down on this day and ended up suffering a fate worse than death.

But she had already lost part of her liver for Seth. How could she survive losing a kidney too?

Yet now, living this day again, Bella understood everything.

If not donating meant death anyway, then this kidney would be repayment—for eleven years of care from Seth. After that, they'd be even.

Gripping her hands into fists, she answered firmly, "I'll do it."

The words caught in Seth's throat. The doctor beside him looked stunned.

"Bella, are you sure?" the doctor asked, alarmed. "We usually don't recommend a second organ donation—it makes the surgery far more dangerous, even life-threatening."

Bella nodded. Of course, she understood the risks. But if it meant staying away from Seth forever, she was willing to die.

Watching her sign the agreement with his own eyes was the only thing that finally eased Seth's heart.

He had feared she was lying to him. He hadn't expected her to go through with it, without hesitation.

His gaze softened as he looked at her. "Since you agreed to donate, I'll keep my word. Whatever you want, name it."

"I only have one request. I want to sever ties with the Rogen family. From now on, I am no longer one of you."

Seth frowned. "Are you serious?"

He had assumed she would use this to force him into marriage. He never expected her only request would be to cut him off.

Bella met his eyes, her voice cold. "Yes."

Seth studied her for a few seconds, then his expression darkened.

"Bella, I suggest you give up your little schemes. Don't think that just because you cut ties with the Rogen family, there's a chance between us. There will never be anything between us. I only love one person—Faye. Not you."

Bella's lashes trembled. "I know."

The memories of her past life's humiliation were still fresh. Of course, she knew how much he loved Faye.

That was why, this time, she would never love him again. All she wanted was distance—distance and nothing else.

Seth looked at her for a moment longer.

He didn't know why, but something about her felt different now. He couldn't quite say what.

Just as he was about to speak, a voice from the hospital room interrupted them.

Faye.

He rushed inside instinctively. Bella's face dimmed, but she followed.

Faye was coughing, her eyes rimmed red.

"Seth, stop pressuring Bella. I know she doesn't like me. Even if she refuses to donate, I understand."

Before she could say more, Seth grabbed her hand, his voice full of joy. "Faye, Bella agreed. You're going to be okay!"

Faye froze. Her gaze snapped to Bella, stunned—then her eyes turned bloodshot. "Seth, did she make you promise to marry her?"

Before he could answer, Faye slapped Bella across the face.

A red mark bloomed instantly. Clutching her chest, Faye shouted, "Bella, do you have no shame? Seth is your uncle—how could you suggest something so disgusting? Seth, if you marry her, I'd rather die right now!"

Her outburst didn't even make Seth glance at the bruised Bella. He only held Faye tighter.

"Faye, the only one I love is you. I'll marry no one else. As for anyone else—don't even think about it."

Bella touched her burning cheek and let out a small, bitter smile. She took the hint and quietly left, but just as she stepped out, she heard their voices.

"She already donated her liver to you. Would donating a kidney now be dangerous?"

Bella paused mid-step. A part of her still hoped for his answer.

But it shattered the next second.

"You know me, Faye. I don't care what happens to anyone else. I only want you to get better. That's all that matters."

Bella stood still for a moment, then calmly pulled out her phone and made a call.

"Hello, Counselor? About the Caledon Volunteer Program you mentioned last time—I'd like to join."