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The Alpha I Cannot Love Novel Cover

The Alpha I Cannot Love

Bound by a fated soulmate connection their clan condemns as a sin, Lyra and her stepbrother Kai are forced to hide their forbidden desire. They seek refuge in fake relationships, but the denied mate bond rapidly ravages Lyra's health while fueling Kai's bitter, obsessive jealousy. When a sham engagement pushes Lyra to her absolute physical limit, their buried longings erupt. Now, they must unite to survive their hostile pack and the predatory wolves threatening to tear them apart.
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Chapter 1

"Take your medicine, Lyra," my mother demanded, her voice sharp in the quiet of the luxury sedan.

"I took my pills an hour ago," I replied, staring out the tinted window.

"Take another one," she insisted, shoving a small plastic bottle into my lap. "I will not have you collapsing in front of Alpha Thorne on our first day."

"It's a heart stimulant, Mom. If I take another, my chest will explode."

She snatched the bottle back and shoved it into her designer purse. "Then fix your posture. Stop slouching."

"I'm just tired from the flight."

"You are always tired. But today, you will pretend you are not." She grabbed my chin, forcing me to face her. "Richard is a powerful man. This pack is our sanctuary. Do not ruin this for us with your weakness."

"I'll stay out of the way," I promised.

"See that you do. His son, Kai, is the future Alpha. He doesn't have patience for strays."

The car rolled to a stop. The driver opened my door, and I stepped out onto the sprawling driveway of the Thorne estate. My legs trembled instantly. I gripped the edge of the car door to steady myself.

"Stand up straight," my mother hissed, linking her arm through mine in a grip that felt more like a vice than a comfort.

We walked up the wide stone steps. The heavy oak doors swung open before we could knock.

I stepped over the threshold.

The air inside the foyer hit me like a physical blow.

A guy stood at the base of the grand staircase. Tall, broad-shouldered, with sharp features and messy dark hair.

Kai. Richard's son. My new stepbrother.

He turned his head at the sound of our footsteps.

Our eyes locked.

The impact shattered my defenses in a fraction of a second.

A sharp, agonizing spike drove straight through my heart. My hands flew to my chest.

My knees turned to water. I swayed, dropping my duffel bag to the marble floor with a heavy thud.

I couldn't look away from him.

Every nerve in my frail body screamed at me to close the distance. A terrifying, undeniable sense of belonging flooded my veins. It anchored me to the spot, whispering a single, dangerous word in my mind.

*Mate.*

Kai froze.

A bright, dangerous gold flared in his dark eyes. His inner wolf was clawing at the surface, desperate to answer the call.

He took a ragged step toward me, driven by the exact same pull.

Then, his jaw locked.

He grabbed the wooden banister. His knuckles turned stark white. The thick wood groaned and splintered under his brutal grip. He was fighting the instinct, forcing his body to stay put.

"Mom," I choked out, my vision blurring.

"Oh, look at the time," my mother said, completely oblivious to the silent explosion between us. "I need to find Richard. Kai, be a dear and show Lyra to her room?"

She hurried down the hall, her footsteps fading quickly.

We were alone.

Kai closed the distance, but not to embrace me.

He stopped two feet away, towering over my trembling frame. The golden hue in his eyes receded, replaced by flat, freezing ice.

"Don't," he ordered, his voice a low, hostile scrape.

"I didn't say anything," I whispered.

"Your eyes are screaming it." He leaned in. "Kill whatever hope just sparked in your head."

"You felt it too," I challenged. My voice shook, but I refused to back down.

"I felt a biological glitch," Kai sneered. "Nothing more."

I flinched as if he had struck me.

"My father married your mother," he continued, each word a hammer driving a nail into my coffin. "That makes us stepsiblings. That is the beginning and the end of our story."

"I never asked for this."

"Good. Then you won't mind keeping your distance." He crossed his arms, building a physical wall between us. "We are family on paper. Do not look at me like I'm yours. Do not try to claim this bond. I will never accept you."

Instead of crying, a dry, hollow laugh escaped my throat.

Kai narrowed his eyes. "You think this is funny?"

"I think it's a joke," I replied, forcing my weak legs to stand firm. "The Moon Goddess pairs me with someone who hates me on sight."

"The Goddess made a mistake," he shot back. "I need a Luna who can lead."

"And I need a mate who isn't a tyrant. Looks like we both lose."

His eyes flashed gold again, a warning growl vibrating in his chest. "Watch your mouth."

"Or what? You'll reject me? You already did."

"I haven't formally severed the bond," he warned, stepping closer. "Don't push me to do it. You wouldn't survive the severing. You look like you can barely stand as it is."

The words pierced my heart. He noticed my frailty and used it as a weapon.

"You don't even know me," I argued.

"I know enough. You're weak. Your mother married my father for protection. You're a liability to this pack."

"I didn't ask for a mate," I snapped. "Especially not an arrogant Alpha who thinks he can override fate."

Kai stepped into my space, forcing me to tilt my head up.

"I just did," he whispered. "Fate doesn't run this pack. I do."

"Then why are your hands shaking?" I asked.

He yanked his hands back, shoving them into his pockets. A muscle feathered in his jaw.

"Stay in your lane, Lyra," he warned, his tone deadly. "Your room is on the second floor, last door on the left. Find it yourself."

He turned on his heel and walked out the front door, leaving me alone in the cold foyer.

***

The grandfather clock in the hallway chimed two in the morning.

I lay curled on my side in the center of the massive, unfamiliar bed.

The sheets felt like ice against my skin.

I pulled the heavy duvet up to my chin, but it didn't help. The cold wasn't coming from the room. It was coming from inside me.

My body was failing me in a completely new way.

The mate bond, freshly awakened and immediately rejected, was tearing me apart.

A hollow emptiness gnawed at my stomach.

I tried to sit up and grab the glass of water on the nightstand. My arm gave out. I collapsed back onto the mattress with a pathetic gasp.

Water splashed over the rim of the glass, soaking into the mahogany wood. I didn't have the strength to wipe it up.

A dull, relentless ache pulsed in my organs. It wrapped around my ribs and squeezed tight, stealing my oxygen.

I squeezed my eyes shut, but all I saw was Kai's face.

"I felt a biological glitch."

His words echoed in the dark room.

The flash of gold in his eyes. The desperate grip on the banister. The sheer disgust in his voice when he called me a hospital patient.

I hugged my knees to my chest, trying to hold my fracturing soul together.

"Just a glitch," I whispered to the empty room.

A tear finally broke free. It slid down my cheek and soaked into the pillow.

Wolves needed their mates. A rejected bond was a death sentence for a healthy wolf. For someone as frail as me, it was a fast track to the grave.

If he didn't accept the bond, my body wouldn't survive the rejection.

Suddenly, the temperature in the room plummeted.

A heavy, oppressive aura leaked under the crack of my bedroom door.

The floorboards in the hallway creaked.

Someone was standing right outside my room.

And the frantic, desperate hammering of my heart told me exactly who it was.

"Kai," I breathed out.

The brass doorknob slowly began to turn.

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