Never Whole Again

I pulled the stuffed doll out of the bag and threw it into the trash can.

“I’ve decided to take Bonnie’s stuff with me. Everything else… you can just get rid of it.”

I no longer wanted this home or this man.

Sean stared at the doll in silence for a long time. When he finally spoke, his voice trembled.

“Phoebe, don’t do this out of anger. Just give me an address—”

I shook my head and turned to leave.

“There’s no need. Since she likes my things so much, she can have them all.”

A flicker of panic crossed Sean’s face. For a moment, he thought I meant Miranda could have him as well.

He was about to chase after me when a loud crash suddenly rang out behind him.

The plaster doll Bonnie had given Sean lay shattered on the floor before the bookshelf.

It was something she had painstakingly worked on for a month while on a respirator. Her right hand held the needle as she shaped it inch by inch.

Kelsey stood in front of the bookshelf, trembling in fear.

“Sean, I just thought it was really pretty and wanted to take a closer look. I didn’t mean to…”

Sean froze for a moment before quickly lifting Kelsey out of the shards. He held her close and soothed her.

“It’s okay. You’re not hurt, are you? That’s all that matters. It’s just a plaster ornament. It doesn’t matter.”

I teared up as I tried to reach whatever conscience he had left.

“Sean, Bonnie made that for you as a birthday gift.”

Sean cut me off impatiently.

“I know. So? Kelsey said she didn’t mean it. You’re an adult. Why are you picking a fight with a child?

“Besides, this kind of thing only costs ten dollars outside. Just get another one!”

His indifference made me feel like ice water had been dumped over my head. It made me feel cold and numb.

To him, the plaster ornament was worthless, and so was his daughter’s effort. Only Miranda and Kelsey mattered.

“Sean, don’t forget your promise for tomorrow.”

I refused to look at them. I picked up my things and turned to leave.

If it had not been for Bonnie, I would not have set foot in this house.

I moved back to my old family home and spent the entire night cleaning it. I went through every room.

Bonnie could not stand filth. If she saw dust anywhere, she would refuse to step inside.

That day, I prepared a table full of her favorite food: chili con carne, spicy pulled pork, and spicy blackened fish.

Her tastes had always mirrored Sean’s. They both loved spicy food.

When she fell sick, I strictly controlled her diet and would not even let her have bell peppers.

But from this moment on, she could have anything she wanted.

I placed Bonnie’s urn on a chair, sat beside it, and waited.

The clock on the wall chimed again and again.

It was 7 p.m., but Sean still had not shown up.

I wanted Bonnie’s last remembrance to be better than this. Sean, as usual, did not care.

All I could do was call him repeatedly.

Thirty calls went unanswered. On the thirty-first, he finally answered with a video call.

I was about to speak when I saw Sean, in an apron, bringing out several plates of carefully prepared food from the kitchen.

Even through the screen, I could see the bright grin on his face.

“Sean, you really went all out!”

Miranda approached Sean and gently wrapped her arms around him.

He did not pull away.

Beside them, Kelsey clapped her hands happily.

“Mommy, can we stay with Sean forever? I really like him!”