Love Turns to Tears and Ashes

I really did not understand him. Hadn't we agreed not to interfere with each other private lives? I did not complain when he stayed out all night or cooked for his ex. Yet here he was, questioning her.

"If you needed money, couldn't you just ask me?" Connor tossed a sleek black credit card onto the table.

"Take it. Stop embarrassing me," he added.

I just smiled bitterly. I had been so fool to think he would care for me. Of course, this was not about me at all. It was because he was just afraid, afraid that I might tarnish the family name. Luckily, there wouldn't be many chances for that.

Item number two on my Bucket List was to spend his last birthday together with him.

This would be the fifth birthday I celebrated with Connor. Whether he appreciated it or not, each year I had carefully chosen a gift for him.

The first year, it was a custom figurine of him in cartoon form. The second year, a hand-knitted sweater, tailored to his exact size. The third year, his portrait. The fourth is a commemorative seal. I wondered, what should I give him this year?

After a lot of thought, I decided to make a birthday cake from scratch.

Connor had a strict fitness regime, so his daily requirement was very harsh. He did not eat something with oil, salts, sugar, or fat. He did not eat something too cold or something that was grilled or fried. So, to fit his needs, I prepared a cake with all-natural ingredients. It wasn’t the most attractive cake, but it was healthy and low-calorie.

While baking the cake, I accidentally burnt my hand. As a result, I got a blister on my palm but I kept pushing to finish the cake.

As the night got late, I still did not see Connor. Although I hesitated, I pulled out my phone and dialed his number.

"Hello?" he answered. His voice was barely audible amid the noisy background.

"Connor, are you coming home tonight?" I asked.

"I'm not sure," he answered. "What is it?"

As I considered what to tell him, another voice came into the line, "Is that your wife? Hi, sister-in- aw, it's Connor's birthday today. It isn't right if you're not here, right? Come on here!"

"Get lost!" Connor muttered to the other man before speaking back to the phone, “Can you come here? Though I really doubt that you'll like it here. This place is pretty loud."

"Oh, I'll come," I said.

I followed the directions that he shared and arrived at a private room with a cake in my hand.

"Hey, the missus is here!"

"Sister-in-law, have a seat!"

“I'll toast to sister-in-law!”

As his official wife, I was treated with respect as his friends gathered and gave me toast after toast. Although I was not a big drinker myself, I did not want to spoil the mood, so I drank every toast they offered.

Even though Connor saw this, he kept his silence while smoking his cigarette and ignoring me.

Before long the door opened again and a radiant Kelly walked in with a beautiful dress in her body. I immediately realized this was Connor’s birthday, of course, she would be here!

Without a word, she sat next to Connor. Her familiarity with everything suggested that she had been here many times before. Connor even blocked every drink offered to Kelly. He shielded her as if it was his second nature.

As I looked at them, I felt the same pain I thought I had numbed. I had long expected they were the real couple, but seeing that with my own eyes was harder than I expected.

With a deep breath, I clutched the cake and walked toward Connor. Maybe I could just give him the cake and leave.

However, at the very moment, Kelly called the waiter over. Then someone dimmed the light and a tower of candles appeared on an elaborate cake wheeled in by the staff.

I stood rooted on the ground as I clutched the cake behind my back.

"Happy birthday, Connor," said Kelly with a soft and sweet voice.

Connor flashed her his warmest smile of the night. "Thank you."