Love Turns to Tears and Ashes

"Laura Hall! You can't delay your treatment anymore. You must get admitted to the hospital as soon as possible!"

A year ago, I was diagnosed with kidney failure but the effect of medication was detrimental to my health.

Being my best friend and attending doctor, Matt McKinley, finally gave me an ultimatum, "Forgive me for being too blunt, but if you keep being so stubborn about this, you'll only have no more than six months to live. At most!"

I held Matt's hand and coaxed him, "I know that, Dr. McKinley. From now on, I’ll take my treatment seriously."

After I left the hospital, I applied lipstick to hide how worn out I was, then rushed off to attend my grandmother-in-law's birthday celebration.

Although she was not my biological grandmother, rather she was my husband's, she loved me so much.

When we ate dinner, Grandma asked, "Laura, you and Connor have been married for five years, so when will you give me great-grandchildren?"

Connor McDavid, who was sitting beside me, responded calmly, "We’re working on it, Grandma. Don’t worry."

I nodded affirmatively, agreeing with his statement, though my heart ached. It was not that I did not want any children. No! However, I could not have them all by myself.

The birthday celebration went on late into the night and at the end, Grandmother instructed a servant to prepare a room for me and my husband to spend the night here.

As soon we entered the room, Connor immediately withdrew the arm he circled around my waist.

"There is only one bed in here. How are we going to sleep?" he lamented.

I pointed to the couch and said wisely, "I'll take the couch."

In the middle of the night, I heard Connor tossing and turning and his breathing labored. Worried about his condition, I asked, "Connor, what’s wrong? Are you sick?"

When he did not respond to my question, I got up and placed a hand on his forehead. At that moment I found out that he was burning up.

As soon as I turned on the bedside lamp, I noticed that Connor's cheeks were as red as a ripe apple and he furrowed his brows.

This reminded me of the last time he had a high fever. I had to stay by his side and nurse him back to his health all night long.

I filled the basin with warm water and prepared to wipe him with a wet towel to cool him off.

My finger had only touched the first button of his when he shoved my hand away harshly.

"What are you doing?" he demanded with blazing eyes.

I said, "You have a fever. I just want to help you to lower your body temperature."

"Who’s got a fever?" He yanked the blanket over his lower half and covered himself completely.

I stated patiently, "Your body temperature is high enough to fry an egg. If you bundle yourself like that, you'll end up getting worse."

Then I reached out my hand again with the wet tower, trying to press it against his collar.

"Get away from me!" He pushed me forcefully.

His shove made me stumble backward and knocked over the water basin, making my hair and clothes drenched with water.

However, seeing my wet and disheveled state, Connor did not have any sympathy for me at all. He sneered, "Stop acting, Laura. Do you really think this little trick of yours will make me want to touch you?"

When I saw the furry in his eyes, I suddenly recalled what Grandma had whispered to me earlier, "Connor is so useless. Let me help you two."

So, it wasn’t a fever after all, but it must be the result of the drug that Grandma had given him.

Without looking at me again, he walked past me and went straight to the bathroom.

Icy cold-water droplets dripped down my hair, falling one drop after another, like my bleeding heart.

This was her marriage. This was the man she had loved for nine years.

My feelings for Connor had begun in the first year of my university day. I had longed for his love for four years and not once had I confessed my true feelings to him. I had never imagined that at the graduation banquet in our senior years, Conner had publicly declared his love for me.