Five Years of Nothing

Uncle Roland and I were busy sorting out the things I would take to my parents' house. It didn't take long since I didn't have much left after giving most of it to Uncle Roland.

I decided to check my phone while taking a break from packing. Secretly, I still hoped Ricky would reach out first, but that hope faded. Instead, there were 99+ group chats. I had handed in my resignation letter yesterday, so were they buzzing because of that?

Unfortunately, the sweet surprise I hoped for didn't come true. Christine posted a bunch of photos stuck on her bedroom wall, under a string of aesthetic fairy lights. They were photos of Ricky, and some of them were of the two of them together, taken on various occasions.

[Never felt this happy having such a kind and caring boss.]

That caption made no sense at all. Then it was followed by a photo of a man’s and a woman’s feet against the white hospital floor. [My boss took me to the hospital, even though I could go by myself].

I rolled my eyes. So this is what you want, Ricky? After being with me for five years, did you get bored? Then why not just end this boring relationship?

It started with that white gold bracelet, then all the attention focused only on Christine. The white gold bracelet was a custom piece Ricky ordered just for me, part of a set with a necklace and ring. He hadn’t had the chance to give me the jewelry set, even though it was ready three months ago.

And Ricky had already given the bracelet to Christine. Maybe not just the bracelet, but also the ring, the necklace, and his heart. So what’s left for me?

I turned my face away, trying to hold back my tears. By chance, I saw Uncle Roland pulling a large box out of my closet.

It was a box filled with memories from my five years with Ricky. It contained photo albums that Ricky claimed held 9,999 photos of our time together. He stopped adding to it last year because the final photo, which would mark the end and beginning of a new chapter in our lives, was supposed to be our wedding photo.

Now, Ricky was piling up new photos with someone new. So what did all this mean? Forget planning a wedding, every time I brought up the topic, Ricky would avoid it or glare at me.

Sensing the heavy and awkward atmosphere, Uncle Roland excused himself and asked me to call him whenever I needed. After he left, I sat in the same spot for a while, my mind exhausted from figuring out how to end my emotional suffering.

As night approached, I decided to truly focus on my decision to marry the man my parents chose for me. It had to start with me, by erasing one by one the memories with Ricky.

I filled the box with photo albums and all the things Ricky had given me since we started dating. Then I took it to the backyard of my apartment and burned them one by one in a metal drum.

“Jemima! Oh my God, I’ve been looking for you everywhere! What are you doing playing with fire on a windy day like this?”

The shout startled me, along with a hug from behind. I smelled the musk and citrus cologne Ricky always wore, so I knew it was him. But I no longer felt peace when Ricky hugged me, especially when I also smelled a floral perfume on his clothes that wasn’t mine.

It was the scent Christine usually wore. A soft floral aroma that matched the image of the pure Virgin Mary. Hiding my disgust, I pushed Ricky’s chest away. Ricky looked at me with a scrutinizing gaze. After realizing I was calm, he shifted his gaze to the metal drum with the still-burning fire.

I casually tossed the last photo album into the fire, watching Ricky's reaction. Sure enough, a few seconds after realizing what I had thrown, Ricky quickly tried to save it.

"Termites were eating those albums. I wasn't careful storing them," I said without helping Ricky. I knew he could handle it himself.

Ricky pulled his hand from the fire without injuring it. "What a shame. You should have waited for me to deal with the termites instead of burning them right away," Ricky muttered sadly, watching the album pages slowly turn to ash.

"Are you still mad at me? I already told you that you need to fix your attitude. There's nothing going on between me and Christine. Why didn't you go to the office today?" Ricky asked, hitting me right in the heart.

I slowly walked back to my apartment on the third floor. Ricky followed behind me. "I sent my resignation email two days ago," I replied calmly.

"Why are you acting like this? Grow up, Jemima! How could you just resign without any notice? Who's going to do your work?" Ricky shouted as we almost reached the ground floor.

Realizing this conversation would take a while, I pulled Ricky to the quieter side garden and spoke.

"First, you have Christine, who’s been taking over all my work lately. Second, I have the right to resign whenever I want!" I snapped. Ricky looked at me in disbelief.

"You're jealous! I've told you countless times there's nothing between me and Christine! Do you know the office is a mess because there's no one to assist me? Christine is out because of her burn, and you choose to quit?" Ricky retorted, unwilling to back down.

I scoffed. From what I saw in the group chat earlier today, Christine didn't look like someone who needed bed rest at all.

"Whatever, Ricky. I don't care about your relationship, the office, or you. I'm tired of you always accusing me of being immature or demanding that I grow up.

Have you ever noticed how hard I've tried? Do you realize how long you've been ignoring me for someone else?" I said, my voice choking.

Ricky looked at me, puzzled.

"I'm done, Ricky. It's up to you now. Do whatever you want, and don't ever involve me again!"