When the Tide Recedes, I Give Farewell to the Long Night

4: 4

4

The second my summer shift ended, I rushed home.

Cheryl's car was already parked downstairs.

Someone was hauling things into the elevator, and I couldn't wait a single second, so I took the stairs, all six flights in one breath.

My heart pounded, and my hands shook with excitement.

I opened the door to a blaze of light, the living room strung with colored balloons.

"Mom, Dad, I'm ho—"

The words stuck in my throat, and the smile froze on my face.

Under all that lavish decoration, my brother Jonathan stood in front of a three-tier cake, holding Toffee, who wore a little birthday hat.

Mom recovered first and shot me a cold glare.

"What's with all the shrieking? You'll scare my precious granddaughter."

Dad looked just as displeased.

"Gone all day, no sign of you. The whole house is busy setting up and you don't even help."

Cheryl didn't spare me a glance. Smiling, she pulled a gift box from her arms.

Out of it she lifted a glittering little star pendant and hung it around Toffee's neck.

"Happy first birthday, little Toffee!"

That star pendant was the gift I'd bought her last year, with money I earned working.

And she'd just handed it to the dog.

Loss and grief crashed over me from every side.

Jonathan looked up at me. "Bert, what did you get for Toffee?"

Every eye in the room turned to me.

I stood there frozen, my throat aching.

I'd been so sure this party was for me. Who prepares a birthday gift for himself?

Seeing me say nothing, Jonathan's eyes went misty.

"Bert, is it that you don't want me and Toffee coming home?"

My parents' accusations came one after another.

"Bertram, how can you be so thoughtless? Jon finally comes back home and you haven't got a single kind gesture for him?"

Cheryl lifted her eyes to me, distant and cool.

"Bertram, you really are in the wrong here."

I kept my head down and bit down hard on my lip.

They'd gone to all this trouble, pouring their hearts into a birthday for my brother's pet.

And not one of them remembered that today was my birthday too.

"It's a good day. What are you doing with that miserable face?"

"Get back to your room. Stop embarrassing us out here."

Mom dragged me back to the storage room and locked the door from the outside.

Before long, laughter and cheerful voices drifted in from the party.

Tears soaked through the pillow.

I don't know how much time passed before thick smoke filled the air.

I jerked awake and beat on the door with everything I had.

No one answered. Choking, coughing, I grabbed the hammer from the toolbox beside me and pounded at the lock.

I was about to break out when the cabinet beside me toppled over and slammed onto my legs.

I crashed to the floor, unable to move.

"Help, someone help—"

The door to my parents' bedroom opened, and Mom stepped over me and shoved into my brother's room.

She carried him out on her back and ran, never once looking back.

The smoke thickened, and I coughed violently.

Then Cheryl came into view, and a spark of hope flared in me again.

"Cher, I'm here—"

Her steps paused. Then she turned and went into my old room instead.

Moments later, she hurried out with Toffee in her arms.

I closed my eyes, and tears slid down my cheeks.

At the edge of life and death, in her heart, the dog's life mattered more than mine.

Everything in me went cold.

I slowed my breathing, but the smoke still forced its way into my nose from every direction.

My breaths came faster and faster.

I clawed my way toward the door with the last of my strength.

There was movement at the doorway again.

Dad had come back, and I thought he'd finally realized I was still inside.

My throat couldn't make a sound anymore, so I just looked at him through my tears.

Instead he stepped past me and ran to Toffee's room.

When he came out, Toffee's kennel was in his arms.

"What are you lying there for? Fighting a dog for attention, and now you're faking injuries too? Have you no shame?"

Watching my father's back as he walked away, I couldn't help but laugh.

The smoke was dulling my mind.

At the edge of despair, I laughed at myself, bitter and hollow.

Fine, then. I'll give this life back to you.

From this day, the debt of being born to you is paid off. We owe each other nothing.