The Illusion of Forever

Time to Make Changes

Nicholas went back to bed in the middle of the night, stinking of sweat and dirt, after he had finally gotten Ashley to sleep. I turned away from him, hoping that sleep would come soon. I didn't want to argue about what had happened today, but he wasn't going to let me off that easily.

"Luna, I know you're not happy about Ash staying with us, but I already promised her she could stay for a while. Don't worry, she won't be here long. She's in a fragile state right now, and she needs someone to take care of her."

I gave a muffled response. "Do whatever pleases you."

The next moment, I felt his hand resting on my waist, and he began to caress me in slow circles. His breath became heavier at the same time.

Something inside my mind snapped, like a bomb going off. The man I had loved for a decade was now someone I barely recognized, someone who had become rotten from the inside out.

"Nicholas," I said, my tone cold and sharp. "Have you forgotten I'm pregnant?"

After a brief pause, he drew his hand away and turned over, putting an invisible barrier between us.

"Sleep tight, Luna."

I opened my eyes and gazed at the flowy drapes gently moving with the wind, recalling the happiness on his face upon our initial purchase of this residence. Back then, he had held me tightly, eyes red with emotion and his voice hoarse with happiness.

"Luna, we finally have a place of our own!"

I believed he loved me, that his heart was full of me and only me.

But when did it all start to fall apart? Was it after Ashley's divorce? Or perhaps it began when I left my job? I was unable to tell.

Confusion and racing thoughts raced through my head until, at last, fatigue drew me under.

In my dreams, I saw Nicholas standing there and waving in the distance. I turned and started to approach him, but before I could get close enough to reach out, he turned and left. I continued to stray aimlessly while making a valiant effort to cling to the bliss that was eluding me.

I was walking through a thick fog when the dream abruptly ended.

A sharp cry startled me out of my sleep.

I turned to see Nicholas running out of the bedroom. It was Ashley, who had had an allergic reaction to pollen.

I had forgotten to remove the roses I bought two days ago from the nursery room, and now she was suffering because of my mistake.

When Nicholas carried Ashley on his back toward the elevator, I caught a glimpse of his face through the closing doors. His lips were parted slightly, and his brow furrowed in deep concern.

Even when I told him I was pregnant, he hadn't looked that worried.

I wanted to close the door, but I noticed the white roses Nicholas had carelessly tossed aside in the corner.

The stems remained moist. The flowers' lives were taken before they could bloom. Their destiny might have been predetermined from the minute they were harvested.

Just like mine.

I cleaned up the puddles on the floor and gathered the fallen petals strewn across the living room before taking the bouquet downstairs to throw them out.

In the elevator, I ran into my neighbor, who was taking her child to school.

"Miss, did your brother bring his girlfriend home last night?" the child asked innocently.

My face turned pale.

Even outsiders had noticed the inappropriate closeness between Nicholas and Ashley, while I had been deluding myself all along.

I had made excuses for him, telling myself that no matter what Nicholas did, there was always a valid reason behind it. But in the end, my tolerance and generosity had only harmed me, leading him to believe that I would never leave, no matter how far he pushed me.

Noticing the shift in my expression, the woman quickly clamped a hand over her child's mouth and muttered an apology. I just shook my head and stepped out of the elevator wearily.

In the distance, the first light of dawn was breaking through, turning the sky into a canvas of deep reds and golds.

It was time for me to make changes in my life.