The Grimoire of the Blue Crystal

When I got home, I was so tired that I threw myself down on the bed, fully clothed. I didn't know anything else about myself until the next morning, when Alfonso started whistling from the street below my window.

I wasn't in the mood to see anyone; I spent the night dreaming so many things that I was confused. He came over, and I didn't even look out to give him an excuse; I just wanted to be alone. I covered myself with the sheet and stayed in bed, trying to sleep a little longer.

I slowly opened my eyes, undecided whether to continue sleeping or get up. Sunlight illuminated my room, and I cheered up at the bright colors of the tapestries. Nevertheless, I covered my face with the sheet again. Thoughts began to invade me: you left him alone last night; you told him you'd give him the answer in an hour; you're not like that; he may not be who he says he is; be careful.

"Stop!" I shouted. I can't assume bad things when there's still hope.

I sat up in bed and looked around. The house was in disarray, as if burglars had broken in.

"What happened here?" I threw myself onto the carpet to check the chest and drawers. Everything was in disarray. Nothing seemed to be missing. I went down to the other two levels and they were in order. Whatever they were looking for, they thought it was in my room.

I remembered my grandfather's words.

"Were they looking for the jewel Grandfather told me about?"

I tidied up everything they'd thrown away and, putting things back in their places, went to the riad where Alfonso was staying and found him having breakfast.

"Good morning, Fatima," he greeted seriously.

"They're no good for me," I replied in the same tone.

"You stood me up yesterday. I waited like a fool, you know?"

"Was it you who broke into my house?" "Have you gone crazy?"

"Tell me the truth. Why did you come to Murra Kish?"

"I've told you on more than one occasion."

"What's the real reason?"

"My words have been as clear as sunlight. I don't understand why you're asking me so many strange questions."

"A woman's intuition told me I was telling the truth; however, I was afraid of missing the point. I was excited, in love, to the point of being afraid of what would come next."

"Last night, burglars broke into my house. I don't feel well; it's something that's never happened to me before. This is the second time this kind of thing has happened, right after your arrival."

"Wait, aren't you thinking that?"

"I think what anyone in my place would think."

"I know I'm a stranger, a mere foreigner."

"Exactly. You're just passing through to make my life a problem, and it's not fair."

"I'm sorry, I didn't see it that way. I thought we were having a good time together."

"I consulted my grandfather, and he asked me to send you back to your house."

"Don't do that to me. If you want, I can talk to him."

"I don't know if it's a good idea."

"Let him decide, I beg you."

"I'll think about it. I came to tell you the answer is no. I'm the custodian of the library, and I won't let you in except during the hours posted on the door. I'm not going to give you special treatment. You'll use the restroom like any other user, okay?"

"Okay, Fátima. I understand. Join me for breakfast, please."

"Okay."

A little calm followed after drinking the first cup of tea. We didn't speak; we just ate a little of each dish in silence. My thoughts were sorting out in my head. I suppose something similar was happening with Alfonso. Whatever his intention was, he had already shielded me. If his interest was romantic, fine, but if he was falling in love with me to take advantage of my position, he'd have to get the hell out of here.

"Can I ask you something," he commented, breaking the silence.

"Sure, I'm listening."

"We can spend time these days. You'll be free until the repairs are finished."

"I don't know, what's your plan?"

"To explore, to walk around."

"Go on your own. I'll catch up with you when I can, okay? I have something important to take care of."

"Okay, I just hope you're not upset with me. I want you to go back to the same person I knew you."

"Thanks for breakfast. I'm just nervous. I'll get over it. I'll write to you."

I ran back home with renewed energy. I stopped at the portico and closed my eyes, visualizing the painting of the first Fatima, the founder, the guide, the woman who had left us the responsibility of protecting knowledge and who had also left us her inheritance in the form of a jewel. Before me, there was my mother. I have no sisters.

"I'll look among the things my mother left behind; the jewel must be there."

In a hidden room under the first staircase were several baskets filled with her belongings. Of them, I only took the keys to the library. I remember wanting to store her things where I wouldn't trip over them every day, to avoid reliving the pain of her departure.

I spent hours, lingering over the photo albums, connecting with the family energy, remembering her voice, her laughter, and her caresses.

"I'm going to put on the music she liked best," I said, leaving a trail in the middle of the living room.

The music began to play, and I lit a sandalwood incense stick.

"What did Fatima leave for you, Mother? Is it a jewel? Help me decipher the secret."

I wrapped myself in one of her blankets and began carrying her clothes to my closet.

"I've grown into your clothes now. Although I'm a small woman, I've reached your size, Mom."

Tears streamed down my cheeks as I smelled her scent permeating the fabrics.

"Strangers have entered our house, Mom. Tell me what they're looking for, give me a sign."

A shiver ran through me when the bell rang. I remained silent and didn't move.