The Boyfriend Who Always Picked Someone Else

"Did you fight with Bill again?"

"Bill messaged me. He said you blocked him."

I stayed quiet for a moment,

thinking bitterly that it had taken a whole night for Bill to finally notice he'd been blocked.

"What did he say to you?"

"Nothing much. Just a reminder to make sure you fill out your college applications, and to pick somewhere close to his school."

Then, unable to help herself, she went off on one of her tangents.

"Bill's really a good kid, you know. The two of you grew up together, and he does look out for you."

"It's a shame, though. Your grades are average, you're not exactly a stunner, and he doesn't feel that way about you. Otherwise I'd honestly love to have him for a son-in-law."

I kept my eyes down and said nothing.

She didn't catch my silence, and kept going.

"We don't know anything about picking colleges. You should really ask Bill later, get his opinion."

"I saw him helping his girlfriend with her applications a few days ago. So thorough about it."

"The two of them holed up at home for days, didn't even leave at night. Tsk, tsk, tsk. Young love, all that fire and passion."

My fingers curled tight all at once, pressing hard against my chest.

Mom was still going:

"When I dropped some things off, I saw Bill's scratch paper filled all the way up."

"He even told her she had to get into the best program at an Ivy League school, not waste a single point."

I stood there, and my chest felt like someone had squeezed it hard.

Bill and I had agreed to apply to colleges in the same city.

The cutoff scores in New York were high. With my grades, I'd have to fight just to scrape into a decent state school there.

When my scores came out, I'd cozied up to him and begged him to help me with my applications.

He'd been looking at his phone at the time, and said offhandedly:

"I don't know anything about this stuff. Your scores are decent-college scores anyway. Just pick somewhere that isn't too far from my school."

"As for the major, it's all pretty much the same for you."

Back then I'd even made excuses for him,

telling myself that maybe, as a top student, his only goal was the physics department at an Ivy, so he'd never had to think about applications like the rest of us.

But now, I couldn't keep lying to myself.

Mom remembered something.

"Oh, your teacher called me too. Said the cutoffs in New York are too high, and I should talk you out of it. You—"

I cut her off.

"I'm not going to New York."

I lifted my head and made myself smile at her.

"Haven't you always wanted me to get into a good school?"

"I want to apply to schools in Newport."

"My scores are enough for a top-tier university."

I turned and went back to my room, shut the door, and finally slid slowly down against it.

From Ashford to New York was more than two thousand miles.

Far enough that I'd never again have to run after the sight of Bill's back.

The day the acceptance letter came, Mom held the package with her hands shaking.

"Cory, you really got into a top-tier university."

She grabbed her phone, ready to spread the good news to the relatives, and I pressed her hand down.

"Not yet."

I said quietly, "Let's wait until after I've started school."

That whole summer, I barely left the house.

She knew I was hurting inside but didn't know how to comfort me, so all she could do was push me to go out and clear my head.

What I never expected was to run into Bill and Phyllis at the airport.

They were dressed in matching colors. From a distance, they looked exactly like a couple.

When Bill saw me, his eyes clearly lit up.

But the next second, his face went cold again.

"Weren't you sulking at me, giving me the silent treatment?"

"So what are you chasing after me for now?"