Summer's End,I Won't Save You Twice

The childhood photos of Derek and me that once sat on the coffee table had been taken down.

In their place were pictures of him and Agnes, posing together on some beachside vacation.

I stared in disbelief at the enormous wedding portrait mounted on the living room wall.

That intricate mermaid-cut gown was the exact one I'd stopped to admire in the boutique window more times than I could count.

My gaze drifted downward to Derek, seated in the center of the sofa.

He looked older, more polished, wearing a matching loungewear set with Agnes. Beneath the years, I could still trace the boy I'd known seven years ago.

But when his eyes flicked to me, something involuntary crossed them. Irritation.

That look, that reflex he didn't even bother to hide, froze every drop of blood in my veins.

My voice came out raw. “When exactly did you two start going behind my back?”

Derek frowned. “That's not important. All you need to know is that Agnes is the one I'm marrying.”

He said it like it was nothing, each word light as air, yet every syllable drove into my chest like a spike of ice.

I clenched my fists, drew a long breath, and pressed on. “Then explain the community college. How did that happen?”

I'd performed beyond anyone's expectations on the SATs. I could have had my pick of any top school in the country. There was no world in which I should have ended up at a community college.

Derek tossed a diploma at me, his tone dripping with mockery. “Caroline, did four years at that place rot your brain? We agreed to put this behind us. Remember?”

“Besides, Agnes didn't do it on purpose.”

“And honestly, whose fault is it that you're so gullible? Someone hands you a glass of milk and you just drink it, no questions asked. You missed the application deadline all on your own.”

The diploma grazed my temple as it flew past, leaving a thin red welt.

I picked it up. A vocational technical college. And there, pasted inside, was my ID photo.

The girl in the picture had no light left in her eyes. Not a trace of the future she'd once believed in.

My whole body shook. My fingertips dug into the diploma so hard it buckled, and all I could think about were the years, over a decade of studying until my eyes blurred, of sacrificing everything for a score that was supposed to set me free.

Then a splitting pain tore through my skull, and seven years of memories came crashing in all at once.

I crouched on the floor, unable to stand, tears streaming down my face before I even realized I was crying.

The day college applications were due, Derek had handed me a glass of milk laced with something. And while I was unconscious, Agnes changed every one of my selections.

The next morning, I tried to go to the police. Derek shut it down before I could.

“Agnes was just playing a little joke on you. Community college, Columbia, what's the difference? You're still going to be Derek Whitfield's girlfriend either way. Don't make a big deal out of nothing.”

Eventually, I dropped the case. Derek and I continued our relationship long-distance.

But on New Year's Eve, I went to surprise him in the city, and walked in on the two of them tangled together in the same bed.

I threw myself at them, hitting, clawing, fighting with everything I had. Derek didn't flinch. He calmly helped Agnes into her coat first.

“Caroline, my family would never let me marry a girl from a community college. Agnes is your best friend. She's from a clean background, someone we know inside and out.”

“Once I marry her, you'll still be the one I love most. Isn't that enough?”

Hearing those words, I bit through the soft flesh of my lip and slapped him across the face.

After that day, I threw everything I had into making them pay.

I plastered their bedroom photos across the campus message boards. I played recordings of every sordid detail of their affair on a loop outside the gates of Columbia.

What I got in return was my scholarship recommendation revoked, a psychiatric evaluation order, and a phone call telling me my mother had been hit by a car.

I rushed to the hospital, frantic, and found Agnes in my mother's room, idly flicking at the oxygen mask on her face like it was a toy.

Derek sat nearby, looking down at me from his chair.

“Caroline, this time it was an accident. But what about next time?”

I saw my mother's face turning purple from the lack of oxygen and lunged at Agnes with my hand raised.

Before I could strike, Derek pulled me into his arms. “That's enough. Stop making a scene. Seeing you cry hurts me too, you know.”