Substitute No More

Feeling bad about earlier, the lifeguard helped me call a cab.

When I got home, I saw Nick walking out of the house. He looked a little surprised to see me, and quickly hid some sort of booklet behind his back.

Anything that involved Justin was always handled by his assistant. From the moment Justin and I met, Nick was always around.

I gave him a polite smile and asked, trying to sound casual.

“All those couple activities that Justin did with me lately; were any of them actually for me?”

Nick gave an awkward smile and tucked the booklet further behind him.

“You must be joking, Miss Walker. You’re Mr. Davidson’s fiancée. Of course everything you two did was what he wanted.”

I glanced down at my messy appearance and gave a bitter smile.

“I’ve seen Stella’s list. From the beginning, I knew. And the one you’re holding, isn’t it just filled with pictures of her and Justin?”

Nick looked at me and sighed. His face was full of sympathy.

“Miss Walker, your sister has passed. You're Mr. Davidson’s partner now.”

I gave him a faint smile and stepped aside to let him go.

I had hoped more than once that Justin would see me as I was.

However, time couldn’t make Justin love me.

I dragged myself inside, exhausted. Justin was sitting on the couch, laughing and chatting with Sandra.

They were flipping through a photo album filled with pictures of Stella as a child.

They weren’t worried that I had been left alone at night, stranded on a deserted beach. All they cared about were things related to Stella.

I walked into my room and looked around at the decorations and clothes.

After Stella died, no one asked me what I wanted. My family and Justin just turned my room into something Stella would’ve liked.

All my clothes had been replaced.

The soft, neutral styles I used to wear were gone. Now the closet was filled with crop tops and tight skirts, styles that I never suited.

I sat on the edge of the bed, staring into space. Even if I left, there wouldn’t be anything here that truly belonged to me.

Justin came into the room and sat beside me. He wrapped his arms around me and buried his head in my shoulder, breathing in deeply.

“Eva, your scent always calms me down. I was in a bad mood and got impatient earlier. I’m sorry.

“I should’ve talked to you first about the dress and the ring, but I knew you’d be good and listen.”

He knew full well that this scent wasn’t mine. It was Stella’s favorite perfume.

The one who comforted him had never really been me.

“Justin, I’m really tired. Can you let me go?”

He suddenly shoved me away, his face darkening again.

“Miss Walker, what are you throwing a tantrum for now? Are you blaming me for being engaged to Stella, then? We didn’t even get married! And don’t forget, you had something to do with her death!

“If it weren’t for Stella, you’d still be a nobody!”

I could barely breathe. Justin had told me he loved me. Stella was the one who had lied about her identity.

Her death was an accident. How had everything become my fault?

Looking at Justin, staring at me like I was his enemy, felt like a knife cutting through my chest.

I remembered the boy who once protected me like a hero, helping me escape the torment of school bullying, and offered to pay for my grandma’s medical bills.

Where had that boy gone?

Justin brushed the scar on his finger left by the car accident, turned, and slammed the door behind him.

“Stop being so selfish. Stella was a blessing to us both.”