Sinful Addiction

DIANE

I must've been staring too obviously because his voice cut through my thoughts.

"Sure you're okay?" He glanced at me for a second before shifting his gaze back to the road ahead.

"Yes I am," I rushed out, hating how unsure the words sounded. "Just jet lag," I lied.

He squinted his eyes at me as if he could see through my facade. I slipped my fingertips between the seatbelt fastened around me, fisting them in my palms. Just anything to distract me from the fact that I was alone in this car with him.

We drove in silence, the only sounds coming from the soft music playing through his Bluetooth and the honking of cars outside.

I stared out through the window. New York was just as I remembered it. Busy roads, people going about their daily lives and the annoying traffic. But still, it was home.

A phone vibrated beside me, cutting through my thoughts. I turned at the sound. It was coming from his jacket.

I tried to reach for the phone but at the same time, he reached for it as well, his large palms on my smaller ones. I felt a chilling sensation at the contact. For a second, neither of us moved.

"Um...I was just trying to get your phone for you," I explained.

He lifted his hand from mine and nodded.

I pulled out the phone, but before I could hand it over to him, I caught sight of the caller ID. I instantly felt the color drain from my face. My chest felt tight like I couldn't get enough air no matter how hard I tried.

The name 'Kara' with a red heart emoji lit up the screen. It felt like someone had punched all the air right out of my lungs.

Who was Kara?

I didn't realize I had been staring at the screen for way too long until the call ended. In the second that followed, the phone started to ring again and the same name popped up.

Damon reached and took the phone from my hands, disconnecting the Bluetooth before pressing the phone to his ear.

"Kara," he breathed, his smile wide and genuine. My insides churned, my eyes stung as a feminine voice said something on the other line although I couldn't make out what she said.

"Yes Kara. We're still on for this weekend. I'll come see you," he replied to whatever the person on the other end of the line said, the smile never leaving his face.

That smile that could make any girl go weak in her knees. I'd always wanted to be the reason he smiled like that, but now it was directed at someone else, leaving me deeply hurt.

I knew this was crazy. I knew it'd be insane to say I felt heartbroken when we were never in a relationship to begin with, but that's exactly how I felt.

"Roses? Yes I sent them. Do you like them?" He asked, running his hands through his hair. She made him nervous? And he sent her flowers?

I couldn't tear my gaze from him. I watched his every action, how his smile reached his eyes, how he seemed so carefree and comfortable with whoever he was speaking to.

His girlfriend perhaps? Was she young?

Just the thought of him belonging to someone else shattered my heart into a thousand pieces.

I held back the tears that threatened to spill. I shouldn't be acting this way. I needed to make whatever this forbidden attraction I had to him go away.

Distance couldn't help me get rid of this. Four years away from him and nothing had changed. I was still pathetically in love with a man I could never have.

I blocked out the sound of their conversation, looking out through the windows till the roads began to get familiar.

The sun was about to set, casting an orange glow over the horizon. It was an incredible sight to behold.

I saw the house I grew up in come into view and a genuine smile replaced the fake one I'd been wearing.

The car came to a stop at the driveway. He ended the call and I felt his eyes on me.

"Sorry about that," he said, his voice different now compared to the warmth they were filled with when he spoke to whoever that was.

I forced a smile, fighting the urge to ask him who that was. "No problem."

"Welcome back home," his voice was warm but there was something else underneath. Something I couldn't quite place.

I unbuckled my seatbelt, my fingers fumbling with the mechanism. I needed to get out of this car. Away from him. Away from the cologne that now felt suffocating. Away from the reminder that I was a fool for ever thinking we could be something.

"Diane." I froze, my hand on the door handle.

"Thank you, Uncle Damon. For picking me up," I managed, not meeting his eyes.

Before he could respond, I pushed the door open and stepped out into the cool evening air, finally able to breathe.

He came down as well, helping me bring out my luggage.

"I can take it from here," I said, reaching for the handle of the luggage.

"Are you sure about that?" He raised his brow.

I barely had my emotions in check right now and each second I stayed with him after the phone call I just heard made me feel like a fool.

"Yes, Uncle Damon."

He didn't look convinced, but he let me take the luggage from him.

"Your father will be back tonight. I can wait for you to freshen up so we can go get dinner if-"

"I'm not hungry," I cut him off, my voice sounding harsh and I instantly hated myself for using that tone on him.

He was just trying to be nice and look after me but here I was acting like a brat.

"I'm sorry uncle Damon," I apologized. "I'm just so exhausted."

He nodded and I took that as my cue to drag my luggage into the house. I could still feel his eyes on me till I got to the door and inputted the pass code.

It was past six by now and I knew the maids would have been gone. I was glad to be alone right now.

I went up the stairs into my room. Everything was still as I left it. I abandoned the luggage by the door, plopping down on the soft mattress, the exhaustion finally kicking in.

I reached towards the bedside table, slipping my hand behind the small space between the table and the wall to reach for something.

I pulled it out and stared at it. It was a picture of me and Damon during my high school graduation. He stared at me with a wide smile on his face with his hands wrapped around my shoulder while I stared straight at the camera.

Back then, I'd thought that look in his eyes meant something, that perhaps he felt something for me. But I was mistaken.

I hugged the picture to my chest, laying back on the bed.

My eyes began to feel heavy.

'Roses? Yeah I sent them' his voice replayed in my head as I let a lone tear slip before exhaustion pulled me into a deep slumber.