She Chose Her Abuser Over Me

04

My first night in the new apartment, I poured myself a glass of red wine.

For the first time in nineteen years, breathing felt easy.

No more leaving a light on late into the night, waiting for Evelyn to come home.

No more lying awake, sick with worry over whether Eugene had hit her again.

And no more watching the money drain out of my bank account, one transfer at a time, straight into that little punk's pocket.

I slept better that night than I had in almost ten years.

The next morning, an out-of-state number woke me up.

Malcolm launched straight into cursing me out.

"Chloe, you sold the house?"

"And that's your business how?"

"That house was supposed to go to Evelyn someday. What gives you the right to sell it?"

I walked to the sink and turned on the faucet.

"The deed's in my name."

"But she's your daughter!"

"Then why don't you leave your house to her?"

Malcolm stalled, his voice losing half its steam.

"I have a family now. It's a different situation."

"You have a family, so I'm supposed to cover for your daughter?"

"Evelyn had no money for food yesterday. She cried all night."

Malcolm started laying on the guilt.

"Just wire the child support to my account from now on. I'll hold it for her."

"She's well into her twenties. What child support?"

"And you never paid a cent of it. Where do you get the nerve to manage it for her?"

Seeing he couldn't out-argue me, Malcolm shuffled around on his end for a moment, then just handed the phone off.

"Ma'am, it's me."

Eugene's lazy, insolent voice came down the line.

"Selling the house to hide from us, huh?"

"I'm giving you one last chance."

"Your daughter's with me right now."

"I'm in a good mood, she gets to eat."

"I'm in a bad mood, well, you can figure out what her life looks like."

Right on cue, Evelyn's crying came through the phone.

"Mom, just give him the money."

"Eugene's under so much stress these days. He smashed the TV, and he sold my phone."

Hearing her cry, the hand around my water glass went still for a few seconds.

She was, after all, the daughter I'd raised for twenty-three years, since she was no bigger than my palm.

But her next words shattered every last shred of that instinctive ache.

"Just transfer two hundred thousand first, and Eugene said he'll redo the wedding for me."

"Mom, this is the one wish I have in my whole life. Can't you give me that?"

I closed my eyes. My voice came out cold as ice.

"Did he hit you again?"

Evelyn went quiet for a moment, then fished for an excuse, careful.

"He only pushed me."

"Then call the police."

"I won't!" She panicked at once. "If the cops come, it'll ruin the rest of his life."

I laughed, furious.

"He hits you, and you blame me for not giving money."

"He sells your phone, and you still blame me for not giving money."

"Evelyn, has it ever once crossed your mind that the problem is him?"

"He'd never be like this if you weren't pushing us!" She shouted it, righteous, nothing in her voice but resentment for me.

I had nothing left to say.

You can never argue someone out of a sleep they're only pretending to be in.

Eugene took the phone back.

"You get all that, ma'am?"

"You don't pay up, I'll bring my boys to your company and drag your name through the mud."

I looked at my own calm face in the mirror.

"Go ahead."

"I'll be waiting for you."