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Only When I Love You Deeply Do I Know that My Heart Hurts Novel Cover

Only When I Love You Deeply Do I Know that My Heart Hurts

9.6 / 10.0
Raised in a dark room as a literal source of medicine, a mute orphan's miraculous blood was harvested daily by her adoptive father. Now of age, she is traded away to marry Tom Smith, the President's tutor. Rumored to be a crippled, vicious madman, her new husband represents a terrifying unknown. As she sits trembling in the bridal chamber on her wedding night, the door creaks open. Will this forced union under the guise of bringing him joy be her salvation or another prison?

Only When I Love You Deeply Do I Know that My Heart Hurts Chapter 1

I was a mute.

On my coming-of-age day, I was forced to marry Tom Smith, the President's tutor, under the pretext of making him joyous.

He was a sickly man with a crippled leg. He was said to be a madman with a rebellious, murderous and vicious nature.

On the wedding night, I sat nervously in the bridal chamber.

I was an orphan. I was picked up by my adoptive father and used to make medicine when I was seven years old. My blood had miraculous effects and could be used as a medicine. Ever since I could remember, my adoptive father locked me in a small dark room and took my blood every day just to make money.

I had no freedom or playmates. Everyday prison life made me miserable, so I stopped talking.

With a creaky sound, the door was pushed open.

I sat upright and wrung my hands in fear.

The marriage was arranged for me by my adoptive father. I had resisted and refused, but he beat me up in return.

The footsteps slowly stopped and my veil was lifted.

My heart fluttered as my eyes met his.

I didn't expect that Tom was so handsome.

He had a prominent nose and bright black eyes. His hair was tied up on his head. The black suit he wore made him look extremely handsome. The light shone on his angular profile, adding a touch of gentleness to his handsome face.

For a moment, I was stunned.

"I heard that you are a mute. Give me a smile." After a while, his low and cold voice rang out in the quiet bridal chamber. He sounded like an overbearing superior.

I didn't dare to disobey and just smiled stupidly.

"Tsk, good. Smile more from now on."

The next second, he stuffed a piece of maltose into my mouth.

It was my first time eating candy. It was so sweet that I felt sweet in heart.

He treated me very well. He taught me to read and write in his spare time.

He told me that women didn't need to rely on men blindly and shouldn't be confine to the home, but should make efforts to create an independent and beautiful life.

Under his guidance, I understood a lot of things.

And I also knew that all those things about him were rumors. He was actually an extremely good person.

And our relationship was getting closer and closer.

At night, when I brought dinner to the study, I saw him stroking his broken leg with a lonely look on his face.

He tried to stand up, but he failed every time.

My adoptive father once used my blood as medicine to treat Tom, but because his injury was too severe, his leg was disabled long before.

After coming to my senses, I walked to his side, picked up the paper beside him and started writing.

[Mr. Smith, your leg will definitely get better. Don't worry.]

Seeing my words, he curled his thin lips slightly, stroked my hair and said, "Ok, Lily White, I believe you."

Due to the enemy invasion and floods in the south, he rushed to the White House every day and was even busy at night.

I felt worried when I saw him getting thinner and thinner.

I started learning how to cook, and every night I would make soup, then bring it to his study and give it to his confidant. He would drink it all.

I was very happy.

Two months later, the enemy were defeated and the flood was controlled, so he had some free time.

That night we sat under the peach tree and admired the moon. He took out a piece of maltose from his arms and said gently, "Lily, thank you for the soup during this period. This is a gift to you."

I took it with a smile, and the sweet taste of maltose filled my entire mouth.

At that moment, I felt so happy.

Although life in the house was dull, I was very content. My greatest pleasure every day was waiting for him to return home from the White House.

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Only When I Love You Deeply Do I Know that My Heart Hurts of Contents

Ch. 1 Ch. 2
Ch. 3
Ch. 4
Ch. 5
Ch. 6
Ch. 7
Ch. 8
Ch. 9
Ch. 10
Ch. 11
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