My Love Has Run Off

After I get pregnant, my husband goes jogging every night.

One night, he leaves in such a hurry that he only wears his smart watch. He forgets to bring his phone with him. I accidentally see the messages he sends his female colleague.

"Want to come over for a free meal? And maybe… a little of me, too?"

"I'm not really hungry tonight—except for a taste of you."

The chicken stew he's fed me tonight gurgles in my stomach as it turns.

If I remember correctly, he's just introduced this colleague to my brother.

I belatedly came to this realization. Taking the phone, I input the password—which was still my birthday— to unlock it.

I scrolled through the messages, and the more I read, the more blurry my eyes became.

The two of them worked in the same office, but they were still messaging each other from morning till night.

In one of the messages to her, my husband, Shane Sanderson, complained, "I can't even stand to kiss her when she's bare-faced."

And in another, he wrote, "Pregnant women have a smell. It's so unpleasant!"

I felt an ache in my heart, and then that indescribable pain started to spread to the rest of my body.

When I got the confirmation that I was pregnant, he was the one who eagerly took away my cosmetics. He was also the one who would hug me and then give me a big sniff, saying that I had the milky scent of a newborn baby.

The more I scrolled up, the more repulsive the conversation became. Even my fingers were trembling.

When I reached their messages from a month ago, I saw that they had their first time together. Looking at the date, I realized that it was on the day of our wedding anniversary.

I remembered that on that day, he had ordered cake and fresh flowers to be delivered to me, but he never showed.

"Babe, the company suddenly decided to have a team-building dinner together. I'll be back late."

And to make it up to me, he even transferred me some money.

It was not until 3:00 a.m. did he arrive home. He leaned in to kiss me, stinking of beer and cigarette smoke.

I pushed him away out of disgust, but he just tugged me into his embrace with an apologetic smile.

Come to think of it now, he neither drank nor smoked, so that stench was likely to mask the smell of perfume.

When we were in the throes of passion, he received a message on his phone, and I even reminded him to take a look.

He glanced at it and then placed his phone face down by his pillow. "They're just joking around in the group chat."

Now that I was reading that message with my own two eyes, I only found myself laughably foolish. It was from Robyn Sleight.

"Do you still have anything left for your wife, or are you all tapped out?"

Shane responded early in the morning, "Do you even need to question my stamina?"

I had inexplicably become a device they used for their disgusting flirtations. It was all just unimaginable.

That same morning, he warmed up a glass of milk for me and brought it to my bedside. He did not have me sit up and instead pampered me by having me drink it from his hand.

Before he left, he tucked the blankets around me tightly and then pressed a kiss on my forehand. He even told me, "Get more sleep. Breakfast is already made and being kept warm in the oven."

Absolutely thoughtful.

We had started dating in college and had long survived past the seven year itch after all these years together.

The accidental pregnancy put a wrench in our original plans, but Shane was not the least bit hesitant. He said that the child was a gift from the heavens.

During my pregnancy, his passion for me was greater than before, and that made me think he truly was eager for the birth of this child.

Clearly, I was naive.

One of the text messages from Shane read, "Well she's already pregnant anyway, and I can't exactly say no. So, it is what it is."

It was like a knife had been plunged into my heart and twisted around.

He cheated on me without feeling even an ounce of remorse, then brushed himself off and came home to play the role of the good husband.

It was as if the better he was to me, the less guilty he would feel.

I scrolled through all their messages and took some screenshots for proof while barely suppressing my urge to be sick.

At that very moment, a new message popped up. The profile picture showed my younger brother, Leonard Hephman.

Leonard had said, "Shane, be more considerate of Robyn and stop giving her so much work. She's going to be your sister-in-law one day after all. She's so busy that she falls asleep the moment she gets home, so we never have the time to go on dates."

I unconsciously bit down on my lip.

Not long ago, Shane introduced a woman to my brother at one of our family gatherings. He kept singing her praises. That woman was none other than Robyn Sleight.

Shane replied a few seconds later from his smart watch, saying, "Ask her out to a movie tomorrow. I'll get tickets for you."

Leonard replied with a string of smiley face emojis, followed by, "Thank you, Shane. As expected of my favorite brother-in-law."

I felt my blood pressure suddenly shoot through the roof, and I felt as if the world was spinning around me. It was not hard to imagine what the two of them were up to at that very moment.