Most Afraid of Not Being in Love at The Right Time

The only thing that remained unchanged was his always timely response.

The scene in front of my eyes became blurry and distorted. I suppressed my bitterness and went to look for his dialog box.

But among all the work and personal chat boxes, my name had long been pushed to the bottom. 

I struggled to find it and opened it, but the screen was full of messages with no one responding, which finally made me burst into tears.

[Letha: I made chicken soup today. Would you like to come back and have some?]

[Letha: When will you be back? What do you want to eat tonight?]

[Letha: It's getting cold, keep warm outside.]

It turned out that the relationship was one-sided on my part from the beginning to the end.

Like a moth to a flame.

I and Richie met at a university lecture, where he gave a speech as an outstanding student. 

A white shirt and light-colored jeans easily outlined his extraordinary temperament. 

Elegant and superior facial features sparkled brightly under the spotlight, easily winning the hearts of many girls, including me.

From then on, I began to pursue Richie boldly.

I got up early to deliver food and deliberately created chance encounters to inquire about Richie's class schedule.

I tried my best to do everything I could think of, but he was like an iceberg that could not be melted.

It was not until that time that I accidentally learned that Richie was interning in the hospital and I bought some fruit to visit him.

Unexpectedly, as soon as I arrived at the hospital, I encountered a medical dispute.

The reason was that a patient developed an immune rejection reaction after undergoing a heart transplant operation and eventually died despite failed rescue efforts. 

The patient's family members were extreme in their belief that the doctor had deliberately harmed him.

They rushed into the hospital with a kitchen knife and wanted to kill the doctor who was performing the operation.

Richie was pushed to the front in the chaos. 

Seeing that the kitchen knife was about to chop him, I did not think twice, threw away the fruit and rushed over.

The kitchen knife hit my back and my eyes went dark due to the pain. Before I passed out, I saw that Richie, who was usually indifferent, changed his expression.

“Letha!”

“I…."

I wanted to smile at him, but soon lost consciousness.

By the time I regained consciousness, it was already the afternoon of the next day. 

Richie was standing by my bed, with a faint stubble on his chin and wrinkled clothes, looking in an indescribable state.

Complex emotions flashing in his dark eyes. After a moment, he suddenly held my hand.

“Letha, let's be together.”

I looked up in astonishment. The unbearable pain in my back disappeared instantly. It was as if fireworks exploded in my mind, making me dizzy.

As a result, Richie and I became boyfriend and girlfriend, but we did not become closer.

Most of the time, he was busy with various academic papers and internships. I was by his side, preparing everything for him. As long as I could get a look from him occasionally, I would be happy for a long time.

Sometimes I would feel unsatisfied, but I would quickly suppress the emotion.

After all, Richie had always been like that, cold and calm, indifferent to everything.

But it was not until a month ago that I realized that he just did not care.

No matter how calm and steady Richie was, he had fought and raced cars for that girl and resisted everything for her. 

In the end, when he was powerless, he even struggled by committing suicide.

What was funny was that I spent countless days and nights caressing the wound with heartache, secretly wondering what desperate thing he must have encountered that made him act without hesitation.

It turned out that it was for the lover in his heart that he loved but could not have.