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If You Can't Love Me, Then Let Me Go Novel Cover

If You Can't Love Me, Then Let Me Go

He has always prioritized Maddie, his designated childhood mate selected by his family. Caught in the suffocating crossfire of their prearranged bond, she realizes she no longer needs to endure this toxic dynamic. Possessing her own independent heart and a spirit yearning for liberation, she refuses to waste any more time on a connection that was never genuinely felt. She sets a strict deadline: in three months, she will officially walk away from this painful arrangement forever.
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Chapter 1

"Congratulations, Avaline Rossell! You've made it as our top graduate and earned the Reach Oxford scholarship to London."

It was my graduation day, but my boyfriend—Jason Brisbane—didn’t show up. Just a week ago, he promised, "Ava, this job is important, but I swear I’ll be there on time for your graduation.”

I still remembered his words clearly. This should’ve been a happy day, but instead, his message broke my heart.

“Sorry babe, I can’t leave work. Congrats on your graduation, Ava Mae. Don’t be mad, I got you a gift. You’ll love it.”

Work? That was a lie. He went to Melbourne for his ex’s graduation—Maddie Joy. I saw it on social media.

In the photo, Jason smiled, his arm wrapped tightly around Maddie’s waist. Another showed them kissing like they were still together.

Then I saw his comment under Maddie’s post thanking him for the expensive bag he gave her.

“No need to thank me, I’d give you everything.”

The exact same words he said to me four years ago, when he first asked me out and gave me a ring. I used to be grateful for that.

But deep down, I always knew he still loved Maddie. Whenever she called, he ran to her without looking back.

He fooled me with promises. Said he’d marry me after I graduated. But he never introduced me to his family. He didn’t even want to meet my aunt.

I had no parents. Just Aunt Mae and Jason. But only Aunt Mae showed up at my big moments.

“Thank you for coming, Auntie,” I said, hugging her tight.

“Ava, I promised your parents. Of course I’d be here. Happy graduation, darling.” She gently wiped my face and kissed my cheek.

“Come home with me tonight. You’ll leave for London soon. Let me spend some time with you.”

In three months, I left for London to focus on my studies—and to walk away from all of Jason’s toxicity. He didn’t know, and he never will. Let him feel the loss of something he once had but never valued.

That night at Aunt Mae’s, she gave me a surprise. A savings book filled with money my parents left behind.

“Ava, your parents saved this for your college. They always believed you'd grow up smart and make it.”

Tears filled my eyes. Even after death, they still took care of me.

“Thank you so much. You’ve been like a real mother to me.”

I hugged her tight. Her love had always been real, even if she was just my mom’s old friend.

“Ava, I know someone in London. I’ll ask him to look after you.”

“You’ve done enough, Auntie. I can take care of myself,” I replied.

She smiled, holding my hand. “He’s a good man. You’ve met him before.”

I didn’t understand until she pulled out an old photo—me as a child, standing beside an older boy.

“That’s Julian. You may not remember. He’s grown up now, a college lecturer. Here’s his photo and number.”

She showed me a picture of a tall, stylish man with wavy blonde hair and blue eyes.

Back then, after the accident that took my parents, Aunt Mae—once a nanny for a rich family—took me in.

“Julian Ryder,” I whispered. He was the boy she used to care for.

I stayed at her house that night and went home the next day. I thought Jason wasn’t home. But he was—and he wasn’t alone.

Another promise broken. He once said no one else would ever enter our home. That was why I agreed to live with him. But now he brought her.

I walked in and saw Jason and Maddie coming out of our bedroom. My chest burned with anger.

Their messy clothes told me everything.

“Oh, Ava. You’re home,” Jason said, smiling like nothing happened, pulling me in for a hug.

Maddie shot me a cold look. She didn’t bother to hide her dislike.

“Sorry I missed your graduation. Don’t be mad. I got this for you.” Jason handed me an old handbag that looked like it came from a thrift store.

Maddie laughed. “That bag’s perfect for you.”

I gave a stiff smile and took the bag, holding back my anger. “Thanks, Jason.”

“Let’s celebrate together. I graduated too. I asked Jason to get me a bag, and he did. A bit different than yours,” Maddie said proudly.

Her fancy designer bag said it all. I held my old bag tightly and smiled.

“No thanks. You two can celebrate without me,” I said, walking to the bedroom.

The room was a mess. My heart sank when I saw a used condom in the trash. Then Jason walked in.

“Ava, why’d you reject Maddie’s invite? That was rude,” he said.

I turned to him, voice shaking. “Jason, do you really love me?”

“Of course. You’re the only one.”

“Then why did you miss my graduation and go to hers?” I showed him Maddie’s post.

He sighed. “I was already in Melbourne. We’re just friends, Ava. Don’t overthink.”

He didn’t even feel guilty. “Do friends kiss like that?”

“It was just a joke, Ava. Don’t be childish,” he said, voice cold as ice.

Maybe I was the joke. He didn’t care what he did behind my back.

“Jason, you—”

Maddie walked in without knocking. “Jason, take me home,” she said, holding onto his arm.

“Sure. Ava, we’ll talk later, okay?”

“We’re not done, Jason!” I grabbed his hand.

“Come on, Ava. This isn’t important. We’ll talk later.”

He pulled away and left with Maddie. As they walked out, she turned back and smirked—like she’d won.

I didn’t want this toxic relationship anymore. In three months, I’d be gone.

And Jason? He’d realize what he lost—when it was far too late.

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