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I Just Wished To Have You For The Rest Of My Life Novel Cover

I Just Wished To Have You For The Rest Of My Life

Five years ago, Adeline Wyndham promised her dying mother that if her marriage to billionaire Damian Ravenswood yielded no children within five years, she would walk away. Now, grieving the tragic loss of three children and realizing she can never melt Damian's frozen heart, Adeline stands at her mother's grave ready to choose herself. Regretting the years wasted on a humble, unrequited love, she prepares to file for divorce and finally escape the marriage.
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Chapter 1

After losing three children in succession, Adeline Wyndham knelt before her mother's tombstone, holding a box of toys and stood solemnly.

“Mum, the five-year period is almost over. I want to divorce Damian. I’ll take the boxes of toys meant for my three children and leave this place.”

There was no one else in the cemetery. A breeze rustled through the leaves, soft and whispering, as if her mother were replying.

Five years ago, Adeline’s mother, her only family, had died of a serious illness. On her deathbed, she had held Adeline’s hand and made her promise something important.

“Adeline, I can tell. Even though Damian married you, he doesn’t love you.”

“If you have a child within five years, I’ll accept your decision to stay with him. But if not, I hope you’ll let go of your obsession, find the retreat I’ve prepared for you and live your own life.”

“Otherwise, I won’t be able to rest in peace, even in the afterlife.”

Her mother’s voice still echoed in her ears. Adeline closed her eyes, filled with regret. She regretted the five years she had wasted. She hated how humbly she had loved him.

In five years, she had still failed to warm Damian Ravenswood’s heart.

When she returned to the mansion, Adeline passed by Damian’s room and heard soft, melodic music. She already knew what scene awaited behind the door, yet she still walked toward it like a masochist, peeking through the crack with trembling eyes.

Once again, she saw the massive screen that covered the wall, playing a video with only one star. Damian’s adopted sister, Jessica. Jessica was wearing a white slip dress, dancing at her graduation party, looking very pure.

Meanwhile, Damian stared at Jessica on the screen. His breathing ragged, his shirt half open and his hand faintly moving below his firm abdomen.

Adeline lowered her eyes and stepped back silently. She no longer reacted. After all, this wasn’t the first time she had discovered Damian’s secret.

Leaning against the wall, she smiled bitterly.

No wonder he claimed he didn’t have time to bury their child’s toys with her. It turned out that he had spent all his time on this.

Eventually, the music stopped, reluctantly fading. Damian opened the door abruptly. His tall frame cast a shadow over Adeline and his voice was hoarse with lust.

“Did you bury the toys?”

Adeline didn’t look up.

“Yes … ”

“Go change your clothes then. The white slip dress.”

Shame burned through her, but hearing that, she clenched her fists tightly.

Again?

She couldn’t remember how many times Damian had asked her to wear Jessica’s clothes to satisfy his desires.

Today was the day they buried their child’s toys, but he still wanted to do that?

Since their marriage, Damian had given her only one gift. It was an extravagant walk-in dressing room. Later, she discovered that every single item of clothing in it had once belonged to Jessica.

Normally, she wasn’t even allowed to wear them. Damian would only choose one for her to wear after watching a video of Jessica. Then, he would take her to bed.

At first, Adeline thought it was just a strange fetish. She didn’t care. But strange things kept happening.

The first time, when she undressed to please him, Damian suddenly looked disgusted and told her to get out.

The second time, she moaned without restraint. Damian lost control and nearly suffocated her with his hands.

The third time, she looked at him lovingly. In the next moment, he turned off the lights and finished quickly, without a word.

He told her coldly, “In bed, I don’t need you to react. Just open your legs.”

Adeline had felt humiliated, but her blind love kept her from questioning him. At least Damian still wanted her body, didn’t he? Until a few days ago when she discovered the truth.

She watched the video again, then manically compared each outfit in the video to those in the dressing room. And finally, it all made sense.

For five years, she had been nothing more than a tool. A body in Jessica’s clothes, expected to remain silent and still, like a lifeless doll.

With her fingertips digging into her palms, she fought the urge to vomit. For the first time, she resisted.

“I just gave birth not long ago. My body hasn’t recovered. Let’s not do this today.”

Damian’s brow twitched slightly and his voice turned cold as he spoke, “It’s your fault the baby didn’t survive. Don’t take it out on me. Even if I went to bury the ashes, they wouldn’t come back. It’s a waste of time.”

It felt like a bucket of ice water had been poured over her.

Adeline’s lips trembled.

She kept repeating to herself, “Yes, my fault. It’s all my fault.”

Meanwhile, Damian grew impatient.

“Go change your clothes. Don’t make me repeat myself.”

Her body shook. In the past, she would have obeyed immediately, afraid of making him unhappy. But now, she only gave him a bitter smile. Her eyes were full of sorrow.

“Fine. Since it’s all my fault … I’m sorry for wasting your time.”

“I won’t bother you anymore, Damian. Let’s get divorced-”

Before she could finish, Damian’s patience snapped.

He grabbed Adeline and dragged her into the room, throwing her onto the bed.

“So much nonsense. It’s just three kids, so what’s the big deal? If they died, we’ll have more. Who are you trying to impress with this act? Tell me … how many do you want? I’ll give you as many as you want!”

Damian ripped off her clothes roughly. Her eyes filled with horror. She didn’t want to get pregnant again. She couldn’t go through that pain anymore.

Adeline didn’t want to hear a doctor tell her the baby had died again.

“No! Damian! I don’t want this! Let me go! Please!”

But Damian ignored her cries. He entered her abruptly, punishing her and it lasted longer than ever before. When it was over, he got dressed and left without a backward glance.

“If the baby dies, we’ll make another. I can tolerate the disgust. Next time, take off your underwear in advance. Don’t waste my time.”

The door slammed behind him, plunging the room into darkness.

A tear slid down Adeline’s cheek. She was lying still, tangled in the mess on the bed as if she was being paralyzed.

A waste of time. Again. But he had never asked whether she was willing.

No. She had to be willing, whether she wanted to or not. And in the end, it was always her fault.

A while later, her phone rang. She picked it up with a blank expression.

The voice on the other end was respectful as they asked, “Miss, the five-year period is about to end. Are you … ”

Adeline turned slowly and glanced at the big screen, now dark. But those images had already burned themselves into her memory.

She exhaled and composed herself.

“After seven days, erase all of my identity records. Take me abroad.”

The person on the phone responded quickly, “Understood. No problem.”

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