I Disappeared for Him to Regret Me

“You expect me to believe that?” he asked in a low, controlled voice.

My chest tightened, but I kept my tone steady. “I’m only repeating what actually happened.”

A short laugh left him, sharp and empty of warmth.

“Valeria?” he repeated. “The same girl who cries over a stray animal? The one who spent the entire day begging me not to send you to Cassius Vale because she was afraid something might happen to you?” His expression hardened. “I heard she locked herself in her room while you were gone and cried nonstop. She kept saying she wished she could go instead of you.” His gaze locked onto mine. “And now you’re telling me she poured boiling water on you?”

My mouth felt dry. “I’m not making it up.”

“When did you start lying to me, Elira?” His voice dropped, darker now.

“I didn’t,” I said quietly. “I’ve never lied to you.”

He studied me for a moment, like he was trying to see something buried under my skin. Then, without warning, he shoved me hard.

“Still insisting on it?” he snapped.

I staggered back, nearly losing my balance.

“Guards,” he called out.

Two men rushed into the backyard immediately.

“Twenty lashes,” Cassian ordered without looking at me. “Here.”

The guards hesitated for a fraction of a second. None of them liked laying hands on me—they all knew I was usually the one who kept them alive.

But his word was final.

They seized my arms and forced me down onto the wooden bench. I didn’t resist. There was no point.

The first strike landed across my back, and pain exploded through my body, tearing into wounds that hadn’t even closed.

Cassian stood a short distance away, watching.

Unmoved. Detached.

“This is a reminder,” he said evenly. “Anyone who speaks against Valeria will face the same punishment.”

The second lash followed.

Then the third.

I bit down on my lip until I tasted blood. My vision blurred, but my mind kept slipping backward.

I was fifteen the first time I killed someone. My hands wouldn’t stop shaking, the knife barely staying steady.

That night, Cassian had held me.

“Hey,” he said softly. “Look at me. You’re fine.”

“I was scared,” I whispered then.

“I know,” he answered, brushing my head gently. “But you’re not alone. I’m here.”

Now he was standing there, watching someone tear me apart.

Fourth strike.

Fifth.

By the time it reached twenty, my entire back felt like it had been set on fire. Blood soaked through my clothes and dripped onto the ground beneath me.

The guards stepped away slowly, and the world tilted into darkness.

Far away, voices drifted in.

The doctor spoke first, his voice unsteady. “Mr. Valcourt… her pulse is dangerously weak. I don’t think she has much time left.”

Something shattered.

Glass hit the floor.

“What did you just say?” Cassian’s voice turned razor-cold.

The doctor sounded panicked now. “Sir, her condition is deteriorating rapidly. The injuries are severe—her heartbeat is fading.”

“Get out,” Cassian ordered sharply.

Footsteps hurried out of the room.

Silence settled.

A moment later, the curtain around the bed was pulled aside.

Cassian stood there.

His face was partly in shadow, but his eyes were unmistakably cold. My hands—the same hands that had fought for him for eleven years—rested uselessly on the blanket.

“You swore a blood oath to me,” he said slowly. “That night, you said if anyone ever hurt you, I would make them regret existing.”

His voice lowered.

“So tell me, Elira… when did you start cooperating with doctors to stage something like this?”

I didn’t respond.

I closed my eyes instead.

The silence stretched until I felt the air around him shift.

“You’re not even going to defend yourself?” he said sharply. “Do you really think I’m that easy to fool?”

Still nothing from me.

His steps came closer.

“You’ve been strange lately,” he continued, colder now. “But this? Pretending to die for attention? I didn’t think you’d go this far.”

My breathing stayed slow.

I didn’t answer.

That only made his anger sharpen.

“Fine,” he said abruptly.

His voice turned completely void of warmth.

“Throw out everything she’s being given. All of it. Medications, bandages—everything.”

Someone outside hesitated. “Sir Valcourt…”

“Did you not hear me?” he barked. “If she wants to act like this, then she can deal with the consequences herself.”

Moments later, I heard drawers being yanked open, bottles being collected, things shoved into a bag.

Then the door slammed.

The sound echoed through the room long after he was gone.

I lay there staring at the ceiling. Every breath pulled pain across my back like fire under the skin.

But pain had stopped being unfamiliar a long time ago.

Just like him hurting me and calling it normal.

As the night deepened, the pain worsened. My body trembled uncontrollably, sweat soaking the sheets. I pressed my teeth into the edge of the blanket to keep from making a sound.

And somewhere between consciousness and exhaustion, my mind drifted backward.

To the first time I was badly injured on a mission.

I had been stabbed. I was bleeding out.

Back then, Cassian stayed by my bedside for three full days. He never left. He even changed my bandages himself.

I still remembered his expression.

Like it hurt him too.

Like my pain meant something.

How foolish I had been.

I thought it meant care.

I thought it meant I mattered.

…

Morning arrived quietly, and the pain eased just enough for me to breathe without shaking. I had barely closed my eyes again when a knock came at the door.

The butler’s voice followed. “Miss Kane, Mr. Valcourt has ordered you to the main hall. You’re accompanying him today to fulfill a promise.”

Slowly, I pushed myself upright.

Every movement felt like needles driving into my back. My hands shook as I rewrapped my bandages and pulled on a plain black dress.

By the time I reached the main hall, Cassian was already there.

He wore a dark tailored coat, standing beside Valeria as he carefully adjusted a soft scarf around her neck, as if the slightest breeze might harm her.

Valeria stood in a light pink dress, looking bright and untouched.

Beside her, I probably looked like something dragged out of ruins.

“You’re here,” Cassian said without looking at me.

His tone was flat, almost indifferent.

“Stay close to Valeria today. Do your job.”

Then he finally glanced at me.

“And Elira,” he added coldly, “if anything happens to her, you won’t like what follows.”

I lowered my gaze. “Yes, sir.”

The cars were waiting outside.

Cassian helped Valeria into the back of the Rolls-Royce. I took a motorcycle with the other guards and followed behind.

The road out of the city stayed quiet until the sky suddenly broke open. Rain poured down in heavy sheets, soaking everything within minutes.

Cold water ran down my back, slipping into my bandages, reopening pain I had barely contained.

Warm blood slowly traced my spine beneath the fabric.

Valeria rolled the window down slightly, glancing out.

She looked at me riding through the storm for a moment.

“Cassian,” she said softly, “Elira looks awful. She’s injured, and it’s raining so hard. Shouldn’t she sit inside for a while? Or at least have an umbrella?”

For a brief second, I almost laughed.

Cassian didn’t even look in my direction.

“She’s a bodyguard,” he said evenly. “She’ll manage.”

That was all.

Valeria’s lips curved faintly before she turned away, hiding her smile.

I tightened my grip on the handle and kept riding through the rain.

Right.

Just a bodyguard. Just a tool he could discard whenever it suited him. Even if I disappeared tomorrow, he would probably keep going without a second thought.