His Female Bestie Said Congrats, I Said Divorce

At the wedding rehearsal, my husband’s so-called “female bro” suddenly raised her glass for a toast.

“The first toast is to the groom. Dude, you’re married now, so quit sneaking my lingerie when you watch those adult movies!”

His groomsmen burst into loud laughter, and that “female bro” collapsed into my husband’s arms, giggling.

Noticing my sour expression, she deliberately raised her glass again, provoking me:

“The second toast goes to the bride. She looks all pure and innocent, but in bed she’s wild—Ryan Parker really hit the jackpot!”

Ryan Parker wrapped his arm around her, covering her mouth with a doting smile.

“You crazy girl, is that all you ever think about?”

She poked her head out from Ryan’s embrace.

“Come on, little sister, we’ve been tight since childhood, just like real bros. You’re not mad, are you?”

—

I gave a light smile.

“Why would I be mad? We’re all ‘bros,’ right?”

Everyone looked shocked at my words.

Ryan pulled me closer, teasing me with a playful brush across my nose.

“Emily Summers, you’re surprisingly obedient today! I thought you were one of those dramatic girls.”

Vanessa Reed chimed in:

“Exactly! Ryan’s ex-girlfriends were all super uptight. None of them could handle us groomsmen, so in the end, we always had to convince him to dump them.”

She smirked.

“What’s that saying again? Bros before hoes, right?”

As she spoke, Vanessa began pawing at Ryan again.

“Ryan, do you want to run around naked or end up losing an arm and a leg? Don’t forget, I still have those photos of your bare butt from when we were kids!”

Ryan laughed, pushing her hand away.

“Quit touching me! My wife’s right here!”

Vanessa rolled her eyes.

“Oh please, you used to practice unhooking bras on me. Didn’t hear you say that back then! And I had a real boyfriend at the time!”

Then she clung to my arm.

“Little sis, you’ve got to back me up! He ruined so many of my bras—he owes me compensation!”

I tightened my grip on her arm.

“That toast you just gave—are you planning to say the same thing at tomorrow’s real ceremony?”

Vanessa froze, clearly caught off guard.

Yes, today was only the rehearsal.

According to tradition here, both sides of the wedding party had to pick someone to give a toast. Everything had been running smoothly until Vanessa suddenly raised her empty glass to speak.

“So what, you’re saying I shouldn’t talk like that?” She smirked, then slammed her empty glass down hard on the table.

Thud.

The room fell silent.

“Ryan, your little wifey really can’t take a joke, huh? What part of what I said was wrong? I was only speaking the truth!”

Ryan glanced between us, then finally squeezed my hand and smiled at Vanessa.

“Bro Vanessa, you’re like my big brother. My wife is your sister-in-law now, so don’t take her words too seriously.”

Hearing this, Vanessa stomped her foot in fury.

“Ryan, I’ve spoiled you all these years for nothing! You’re not even married yet, and already you’re siding with your woman!”

Ryan turned to me.

“Emily, go on, apologize to Bro Vanessa. She’ll change her toast, and we’ll be done with this.”

He gave me a little shove toward her.

The rest of his groomsmen quickly echoed him.

“C’mon, sis, just apologize to Bro Vanessa. Make her happy, then you can marry Ryan.”

“Yeah! Everyone knows Ryan listens to Vanessa the most. If you want in with this crew, you’ve got to pass her test first!”