Goodbye, My Sweetheart

I heard familiar footsteps rushing up behind me. Dean grabbed my arm, pushed me into an empty room, and trapped me between the wall and his chest.

“Are you mad?” he asked.

I shook my head.

“Don’t be.”

He lifted my chin and leaned in slightly, but I turned my face away. His lips brushed past my hair and landed on nothing but air. He looked caught off guard.

“And you say you’re not mad.”

However, only a second later, that sleazily smiling face returned.

“Alright, alright.”

His voice was low and slightly hoarse, carrying an emotion I couldn’t quite place.

“If you really want to dress like that…” He gulped before he continued, “I’ll get you something even better. Wear it tonight for me alone.”

His voice dropped even lower. “I promise I’ll satisfy you.”

The memory of the half-used box of ultra-thin protection on the bedside table this morning made my face burn like I had a fever.

Last night, he had been urgent and clumsy, trying to prove his love. Sweat dripped onto my chest. When he reached for the box by the bed for the fourth time, I got a little scared and tried to stop him.

“You’ll get tired…”

Dean just laughed, something wicked in his expression.

“Rue,” he murmured against my ear, “when it comes to a girl they love, no man can hold back.”

Maybe he was right. Physical desire couldn’t be hidden.

I endured the discomfort of the first time and let him have his way. Again and again, he kept asking, sounding almost anxious, “Rue, you promised me, right? You’ll apply to a university in Harbor City?”

I got annoyed and flicked his forehead. “Yes, yes. You’re so naggy.”

He pulled me into his arms, already dreaming about the future. “Tree-lined paths, flowers in bloom, the library, you on the back seat of my bike… Rue, we’re going to have the most romantic university life.”

I sank into the dream he painted for me.

Back at the senior year pledge ceremony, he had leaned over and whispered, “Are you applying to Capitol City? But I want to go to Harbor City’s University of Technology.”

His eyes were bright, reflecting me clearly. “Would you come to Harbor City… for me?”

For some reason, I nodded, and his dark eyes lit up like fireworks. He smiled so wide his eyes disappeared.

Suddenly, a ringtone shattered the dim silence of the room. The boy who once looked at me like I was his whole world was gone.

“Dean.” Joanna’s voice came through the phone, soft and teary. “Are you with Rue? Please tell her that I only posted the photo because I was so happy to receive the lucky bracelet. I didn’t mean to upset her. I’ll return it to you right away. Please don’t fight because of me, okay?”

“Mm.” Dean ended the call indifferently.

The silence in the room felt suffocating.

After a long pause, he met my eyes and explained, “I lent the bracelet to Joanna. She has a piano competition in a couple of days. I remember you saying that bracelet could bring luck. You even had it blessed.”

I bit my lip. “I went out of my way to get that for you.”

“I know.” He ran a hand through his hair, clearly irritated. “That’s why I only planned to lend it to her for a bit. She’ll return it after the competition. We’re all friends. You don’t have to be so petty.”

I tried to explain quietly, “I waited in line at Central Pavilion for three hours…”

“Why are you being so stubborn?” His voice rose. “She just posted it to thank me, and you went and left sarcastic comments? Rue, when did you become so narrow-minded?”

I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. Was I really the one being petty? Was I really the narrow-minded one?

I let out a long sigh and said, “Dean, let’s break up.”