Feel His Lies Deeply

My intuition told me there would be a discovery if I opened it. Chase's account followed only one person. When I clicked on that person's profile, she had posted many details about her relationship. Last Saturday, she and her lover went to Bali, strolling hand in hand along the beach. In the photo, the man had a bite mark scar on the back of his hand, left from when I bit him during an episode to prevent myself from self-harm.

Last Saturday, Chase told me he had an important business trip and missed my father's birthday party because of it. On Wednesday, he claimed he had urgent work to handle and would stay late at the office. But that night, the mistress posted photos of her lover celebrating her birthday with a romantic candlelight dinner and a sweet night together.

That night, I had a sudden high fever and took a taxi alone to the hospital in the rain, not wanting to disturb his work. While I was getting an IV drip at the hospital, he was having an affair with another woman.

As I scrolled further, I discovered that most of the times Chase said he had business trips or urgent work, he was actually with this woman. They had been together for a year and I had been fooled by Chase for a year like an idiot.

The mistress's Instagram was filled with followers admiring their relationship and she responded with shy emojis. I sneered and put the phone back in its place.

I looked at Chase's terminal liver cancer report and emotionlessly stuffed it into the drawer. Although I wanted to see Chase's pained expression upon knowing he had little time left, I feared he would refuse to divorce me if he knew and I also worried the mistress might abandon him. Until I had concrete evidence of their affair to file for divorce, I couldn't break things off with them.

The moment I found out about his affair, I decided to divorce him. If I didn't, I'd have to keep vigil for him when he died and have my name engraved on his tombstone as his wife, which would disgust me for life.

The sound of water from the bathroom stopped. I lay back down and closed my eyes. Soon, Chase habitually pulled me into his arms and kissed my face before falling into a deep sleep. Once I heard his snores, I broke free from his embrace and wiped the spot he kissed. Just thinking about him kissing another woman recently made my stomach churn and I ran to the bathroom to throw up.

When you feel someone is dirty, touching them can indeed make you vomit. Chase endured me for so many years, after all.

I left the bathroom and went to sleep in the guest room to avoid hearing his snores and dreaming of ending him. Once I lay down again, I finally dared to cry out in the dark. Letting go of a ten-year relationship with Chase felt like carving out my heart.

We were considered a model couple by everyone and Chase was known for being devoted to his wife. In life, he treated me with care and tenderness, making me believe I had married for love. Now, I smelled the nauseating stench hidden beneath that love.

I didn't sleep all night and woke up with swollen eyes. There were important matters to attend to, so I couldn't stay in bed. After getting ready and going downstairs, I found Chase, who was supposed to be at work, still at home. Seeing him instantly irritated me, making me want to smash things to vent my frustration.

Chase's eyes lit up when he saw me. "Honey, you're awake? I made your favorite soup dumplings. Come and eat ... Honey, what's wrong with your eyes? Are you allergic? Let's go to the hospital and check."

Taking a deep breath, I couldn't continue pretending to love him. "No, I have urgent matters today. Eat by yourself. I'm not allergic, just didn't sleep well, no need for the hospital."

As I was about to walk past him, he grabbed my wrist, which I shook off with disdain. Chase looked momentarily shocked but quickly put on a flattering smile. "Honey, what did I do wrong? Tell me and I'll change immediately. Please don't ignore me."

I looked into his eyes, trying to find a trace of the Chase from the chat records. His acting was too good, all I saw was concern for me. I wanted to confront him, to tell him to stop pretending, but reason pulled me back. "No, I really have urgent matters to attend to." I needed to seek advice from my strategist.

Chase wouldn't let it go. "You're lying. Every time you're angry with me, you sleep in the guest room. Now you're impatient with me, I can feel it." He played the victim, looking hurt. "Have you fallen for someone else?"

I closed my eyes and reopened them, trying to calm him down. "No, I haven't. I'm just mad that you came home so late last night. I had planned to have breakfast with Hanna this morning. I'm really running late."

He suddenly leaned down, pointing to his cheek. "Then give me a good morning kiss like usual."

Whenever he was home, he insisted I kiss him before he left, saying it charged him up to work hard for our future. Now I saw why I had been so thoroughly deceived, his acting was impeccable and detailed. Losing to him wasn't unfair. Chase was like an Oscar-winning actor who even acted while sleeping, habitually holding me and kissing me before falling asleep.

To get away quickly, I reluctantly kissed his cheek and, as soon as I stepped outside, wiped my mouth with a tissue. Kissing such a bastard like him disgusted me.