Death Note: Departing in Torture, Lost Forever

His words hurt me deeply.

In the days that followed, I argued with him, made a fuss, and even mentioned divorce, but Kurt always acted as a good-tempered nice guy, who let me do whatever I wanted.

In my view, it was because he didn't care about me. Whether I would be dead or alive and how I felt, none of it mattered.

As for Anna, she just thought that I was unreasonable and reckless.

I had my pride.

Thus, I would never tell anyone that my beloved one married me because of my father.

The moment I was rescued from the kidnappers, I was lying on the ground, unable to move. Under the gaze of many people, I buried my head very low, wishing I could bury it in the soil.

I wondered if they would also think that it was all the result of my fault.

I wanted to explain to them. I didn't do anything wrong, and it wasn't my fault.

Rosie, the gentle female police officer, took off her clothes to cover me and then picked me up.

She said firmly to me, "Ms. Ball, believe me. Everything will be fine."

I knew that it wouldn't get better.

I was destroyed so much that I couldn't recover.

At that time, I was wondering why I didn't die immediately.

I had no idea why I was still alive after suffering pain.

I doubted whether I could live well for the rest of my life.

The doctor who examined me said that I would vomit and feel nauseous. Besides, my stomach would no longer be able to absorb the nutrients my body needed.

I would have to rely on nutrient solutions later.

The officer arranged for a psychologist to counsel me, then looked serious after the counseling.

She saved her phone number and contact information on my phone, reminding me, "Ms. Ball, if you need me, I can accompany you 24 hours a day."

I shook my head.

I asked the police officers not to make the kidnapping public and asked them not to post my photo.

But as the case was serious, they were in a dilemma.

I told them that I would try to stay alive.

Maybe it was what I said that touched them.

They finally agreed to my request and took me home.

Back to reality, Kurt continued to knock on the door. I took the phone tremblingly and sent him a message on WhatsApp.

[I don't want to see you now. Let's get a divorce tomorrow morning.]

Kurt: [Why?]

I replied: [No reason. I just don't want to waste time with you anymore, and it's boring. I'll move out after the divorce.]

Kurt: [Lara, this is your home.]

As I looked at these words, tears couldn't stop rolling down from the corners of my eyes and soaking into my hair.

[It used to be, but it's no longer my home after we get married.]

Kurt didn't reply to my message. He stood at the door and said, "Open the door, and let's talk face to face."

I didn't say anything or message him again.

Thus, Kurt could only go downstairs. Later, I vaguely heard his conversation with my mother.

"How about it?"

"Lara didn't open the door. It's okay, Anna. She will be fine tomorrow."

"You're not even allowed into the bedroom? Don't you have the key?"

As the sound faded away, I suddenly felt lucky that all the spare keys in the house were in my bedroom.

After lying on the carpet for a long time, I tried to stand up. However, I couldn't do it as if I had forgotten how to exert strength.

I crawled to the bathroom, lay in the bathtub, and fell asleep under the blanket.

I felt damp and cold in the middle of the night, so I struggled to get up, changed my clothes, and took a shower.

With my stomach cramping, I had a stomachache, and soon a bad smell appeared.

Getting up, I changed clothes and cleaned up again.

Later, I couldn't fall asleep anymore, looking at the darkness outside the house.

I wanted to live, but unluckily, in my current condition, I was unable to live long.

But no matter how difficult it was, I would get a divorce.

I didn't want to die as someone's wife.

After I got divorced, I would move out. Even if I couldn't survive, I wanted to die outside the house.

As my mother wished, I would die outside and never go back.