Blaming My Neutered Monkey for Her Baby

"Bullshit! The report is real!" Brenda shrieked. "I already did my homework with the management's office. Your son's name is Jason Parker! Of course the DNA sample belongs to your son!

"Ashley made sure to keep a card up her sleeve. She secretly gathered strands of his hair from the hotel room specifically to run this test."

I had to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing out loud.

"Wow, you guys really had it all thought out."

The thug was losing his patience, aggressively swinging his baton in the air.

"Alright, lady. Enough with the talking! Hurry up and sign the damn papers. You're holding me up from going out for drinks."

He reached for the report in my hand, but I sidestepped before he could touch it and slipped it into my pocket.

"I think I'll hold onto this. It's going to make a fantastic piece of evidence for extortion," I said.

Brenda went completely ballistic, her hands turning into claws as she lunged toward me. "How dare you steal my evidence! Get it back from her!"

The rest of the thugs surged forward simultaneously.

I quickly retreated into my apartment and reached for the security door, but one of them jammed his baton into the gap before I could pull it shut.

The guys outside threw their weight against the handle, pulling back hard. The metal frame let out a horrific, grinding screech.

Just then, a barrage of hurried footsteps echoed from the stairwell.

Robert Thompson, the head of the Homeowners Association, came rushing onto the floor, flanked by a few older neighborhood watch women.

"Stop it! Every single one of you, stand down right now!"

Robert was absolutely drenched in sweat as he forced his way to the front, pointing a finger at the thugs.

The second they saw him, they loosened their grip on the door and stepped aside.

Brenda didn't miss a beat. She threw herself at Robert's feet, crying a river of crocodile tears for her audience. "Mr. Thompson, you have to help us!"

Ashley dropped to her knees right beside her. "Mr. Thompson, I can't take it anymore! Maybe I should just take my own life!"

Robert looked at the glaring paint splattered across the walls, his brows pulling together.

"Emily, what exactly is going on here? Where is your son? Get him out here so we can settle this face-to-face!"

I calmly dusted myself off. "He's right inside."

Robert let out a heavy sigh. "Look, Emily, I've got to be honest with you. You can't run a household like this. Running away from your problems isn't going to fix anything."

Brenda shot me a smug look. "You heard him. Even Mr. Thompson is calling you out. Get your son over here right now! And while you're at it, sign over the deed to this penthouse!"

Ashley handed the contract over to Robert. "Mr. Thompson, look at the terms. We're being incredibly reasonable here, aren't we?"

Robert scanned the document, his expression souring.

"Signing over a luxury penthouse apartment, plus half a million dollars in cash? Don't you think that's a bit excessive?"

"How is that excessive?" Brenda shrieked, her face turning ugly.

Robert turned back to me. "Emily, maybe you should just meet them halfway and pay them some kind of settlement."

I looked at him, then slowly turned my gaze back to Brenda.

"Mr. Thompson, are you sure you want my son to come out here and settle this face-to-face?"

Brenda screeched at the top of her lungs, "Yes! Get him out here! I want to see what that pathetic little deadbeat looks like!"

The thugs joined in, laughing and egging her on, while Ashley kept her eyes glued to the bedroom door.

"Ms. Parker, stop protecting him. If he doesn't walk through that door right now, I swear I'll make a scene you'll never forget!"

The punk handling the phone started reading the livestream comments aloud.

"After all the buildup, that scumbag is finally making an appearance!"

"Everyone, get your screenshots ready! Let's cancel this jerk once and for all!"

I nodded. "Alright. Since you're all dying to meet him, I'll give you exactly what you asked for."

I turned around and walked toward the guest bedroom, resting my palm against the knob.

Everyone waited with bated breath, their eyes glued to the door as Brenda thrust her phone camera into the crack.

"Look closely, everyone! The deadbeat is about to show his face!" she yelled. "Once we hit a hundred thousand likes, I'm personally delivering ten slaps right to his face!"

Ashley pretended to fix her hair, blinking back a fresh wave of tears as she stared at the door, her voice dropping to a delicate purr.

"Mr. Parker, you're finally coming out to see me."

I turned the knob.

With a sharp click, the door swung inward. I let out a sharp whistle. "Jason, come out. You've got company."