Always Second to His Past

The next day was the weekend. Isaac had to work overtime on a project at school, so he left early in the morning, leaving me home alone.

Back when we first bought this place, it was meant to make his commute more convenient. We chose it as our marital home, and the layout had been designed entirely around what was considered appealing to a woman. However, I had never been fond of overly feminine things.

During the renovation, Isaac had persuaded me time and again, insisting that this kind of design created a warmer, more homey atmosphere. Because I loved him, I gave in completely.

Looking back now, the one who truly liked this style seemed to be someone else. In this home, I wore clothes in Lilith's style, lived in a house styled for Lilith, and listened to music that Lilith preferred.

I sat on the couch for a very long time, until the sun began to set and the room dimmed. By the time my tears had dried, my heart had somehow settled into an unexpected calm.

I picked up my phone and called the person in charge at the company, Mr. Dylan Harper. "Mr. Harper, is the transfer position you mentioned before still available? I have decided to accept the transfer and apply to stay in the company-provided apartment."

Mr. Harper sounded a little surprised, but he quickly agreed. "The apartment has been vacant. It will take three days to clean and prepare it. You can report there directly in three days."

"Alright. Thank you, Mr. Harper," I replied.

…

In the evening, Isaac returned carrying a cake box.

"I stood in line today just to get you the blueberry cheesecake you like. By the way, my birthday is in a couple of days. How do you want to celebrate it this year?"

I lowered my gaze to the neatly wrapped box. I didn't like cheesecake, and I had never liked it. I had mentioned it to him once, but he seemed to have forgotten immediately and still brought it home from time to time.

He would watch me force down a bite, then respond with a satisfied smile.

I didn't take the box. As I met his expectant gaze, I asked flatly, "Isaac, do you love me?"

Isaac hesitated briefly, then chuckled. He reached out and ruffled my hair.

"Silly goose, what are you thinking in that head of yours? Of course I love you. If I didn't love you, who else would I love?"

I pressed my lips together into a faint smile and said nothing more.

The cake was placed in the refrigerator, and Isaac didn't seem concerned about whether I ate it. He turned and went into the bathroom.

I walked into the study to gather the documents for my resignation handover. Isaac's laptop sat on the desk, and its screen was still on, with chatting app open.

I had no intention of checking his private messages, but the steady stream of notifications caught my eye. The group chat was titled "Lilith Fan Club".

"Lilith's flight lands tomorrow. The day after, we'll use Mr. Cooper's birthday as an excuse to throw her a welcome party!"

"The place is already set up. It's filled with Lilith's favorite white bellflowers. She'll definitely be moved to tears!"

"Hey, what about Mrs. Cooper?"

"We're throwing a welcome party for Lilith. What's there to worry about?"

The most recent reply came from Isaac.

"I'll be there later. Keep things low-key. Don't startle her."

The "her" he referred to was obviously not me.

As I thought back to the moment earlier when Isaac had asked how I wanted to celebrate his birthday, a dull soreness welled up in my eyes, yet no tears followed.

It seemed the surprise had already been arranged well in advance. I felt like an outsider, as though there was nothing left for me to prepare. I averted my gaze, pretended I had seen nothing, and stepped out of the study.