After the 250th Failed Blind Date

Back home, I sprawled on the rocking chair, soaking up the sun, and played with my grandmother's calico cat, making it meow in protest.

Meanwhile, my great-great-great-great-great-grandmother was still talking to me.

"Why have you failed 250 blind dates? Back in my day, I was the most sought-after bride in the eastern district, famous for my beauty and grace. How can I hold my head up in the afterlife with a descendant like you?"

Because I don't want to get married right now.

"If you don't want to marry, just find a way to refuse."

Do you think I haven't tried?

I remembered coming across a question online: "What's the best way to make someone hate something?"

The top answer was, "Turn it into a job."

So at the beginning of the month, before the school holidays, I called my mom to reverse the pressure about marriage.

"Mom, New Year's is coming. When I come back, you must schedule ten blind dates a day for me."

On the other end, my mom was worried. "Honey, where am I going to find that many people?"

I sneered. "You have so many chat groups; just send out the word."

My mom said, "I can't do that. That would be too embarrassing."

"Mom, I'm already twenty-five, almost twenty-six. Before you know it, I'll be thirty. My grad school classmates already have triplets, and even Tommy, our neighbor and my childhood friend, has a son who is several years old. Aren't you worried that your daughter still hasn't found someone?"

My mom sighed. "Sweetie, marriage isn't all it's cracked up to be. Look, the divorce rate among millennials is 57%, and even the village head's daughter has been married three times. Why don't you take your time?"

"If marriage is so bad, why has she been married three times? I don't care. This is your task. I have a flight next Monday, so hurry up and arrange it."

My mom, forced into a corner, said, "I'm not dealing with this nonsense. Whoever wants to can handle it."

After hanging up, I happily kicked my feet in the dorm, thinking my reverse psychology trick had worked.