
After My Husband Gave My Song to His Mistress
Chapter 3
The front door stayed shut. Maddox was gone.
The silence inside the brownstone was heavy, but it was mine.
I walked upstairs into Beckett’s studio. The smell of his cheap pipe tobacco still hung in the air. I went straight to the top bookshelf, grabbed my locked leather journal, and held it to my chest. Then I reached into the back of the closet and pulled out a black case.
My violin.
I hadn't opened it in five years.
I laid the case on the desk and popped the brass latches. The interior smelled of old velvet, rosin, and aged spruce. I lifted the instrument and plucked the strings. They were flat and slightly off-pitch.
I tightened the pegs. My hands trembled, but I didn't stop. I rosined the bow, lifted the violin to my chin, and drew the horsehair across the strings.
The first note was a screech.
My stomach dropped. I tried a simple scale. My fingers were stiff and clumsy. When I pushed for speed, my left hand betrayed me. The middle three fingers—the ones I had frozen in the blizzard—dragged and slipped. Notes cracked. Passages that used to feel like breathing sounded broken and jagged.
I didn't put the bow down.
I played through the shame. I played badly. My neck cramped, and the skin on my fingertips burned, but I kept going. Midnight passed. One in the morning came and went.
Slowly, the tone smoothed out. It was still rough, but the notes were clean.
Around two in the morning, the edge in my chest broke. The rage that had kept me standing washed away, leaving only an ache. The music didn't feel like a weapon anymore. It felt like grief. Fifty years of invisible chores, cold dinners, and quiet weeping poured through the wood.
My arm dropped. The bow dangled at my side.
I sat down on the cold floorboards next to the open case. I didn't cry. I just sat in the dark for an hour, staring at the polished wood.
Then I packed the violin away, clicked the latches shut, and went to bed.
***
The next morning, I called Professor Eleanor Whitfield.
She was seventy now, retired from Juilliard, and lived alone in an apartment three blocks from campus. In my past life, she was the only person who had begged me not to give up my career for a man. I had ignored her then.
At noon, I stood outside her door.
Eleanor opened it. Her silver hair was pinned back tight, and her eyes were as sharp as ever. She wore a simple charcoal sweater and held a cup of tea.
She looked at me for three long seconds. She didn't look surprised to see me, but she didn't smile, either.
"Everly," she said.
"Professor Whitfield," I said. "I want you to teach me again."
No sob stories. No apologies about disappearing for years. No excuses.
Eleanor stepped back and let the door swing open.
Her apartment was spotless. Hardwood floors, high white walls, and almost no personal photos. Just a grand piano, a music stand, and shelves of sheet music.
She sat down on an armchair and pointed to the sofa. I didn't sit. I stood by the piano, my posture straight.
Eleanor studied my face. Her eyes scanned my jawline, my shoulders, and the way I held my hands. She saw the change. A woman who had walked through hell looked back at her.
She tapped a single finger against her knee. Tap. Tap. Tap.
"One condition," she said. Her voice was dry and calm.
"Name it."
"No excuses. Ever. If you waste my time, the door locks behind you."
"Understood," I said.
***
Training began that afternoon.
Eleanor was ruthless. There was no praise. There were no shortcuts. We didn't touch concert pieces. We did scales. Arpeggios. Bowing exercises until my right shoulder screamed.
Within ten minutes of our first session, she caught the lag in my left hand.
"Stop," Eleanor said, rapping her pencil against the stand. "Your middle fingers are dragging. The third finger is late on the shift."
She didn't ask how it happened. She didn't ask why. She walked to the shelf, pulled out a thick book of finger-independence studies, and opened it flat.
"We rebuild the bridge," she said. "Shift your wrist two millimeters forward on the descent. Use the thumb as an anchor. Again."
For three days, I practiced until my fingers were bruised. I barely slept. I lived on black coffee and bread.
By our third session, the stiffness was breaking.
"Play something," Eleanor said suddenly, leaning back in her chair. "Not an exercise. Something yours."
I closed my eyes for three seconds.
I lifted the bow and drew the first phrase of the Berkshires song.
It was the love melody I had written at twenty-two. The piece I had handed to Beckett. The piece Yasmin was planning to play at the gala.
The melody was haunting and tender, but I didn't play it like a love song anymore. I played it with weight. The tone was dark, full of warning, like a storm rolling over a mountain ridge.
Eleanor went completely rigid.
Her teacup stopped halfway to her mouth. She recognized the theme instantly. She remembered it from my senior showcase at Juilliard all those years ago.
She set the cup down without a sound. She didn't ask who gave it away. She didn't offer a compliment.
She just tapped her finger against her knee.
"Again," Eleanor said, her voice low and tight. "From the top. No hesitation this time."
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