After Eight Years, I Walked Away

I looked at Desmond's face, and the fire that had churned in my chest for eight years went out completely.

I slid my hand out of his, finger by finger.

"Okay."

Desmond blinked, then reached out to pull me in again.

"That's my girl, Ramona. I always knew you were the understanding one."

I stepped back, out of his reach.

Desmond went to shower.

I sat on the edge of the bed, opened the dashcam app, and got ready to unlink the device.

Tomorrow I was going home.

Some things needed to be cleared out.

I must have tapped something, because a cloud recording started playing on its own.

And then Beverly's voice came through.

"Des, could you stop being so good to me from now on?"

"You found me a job, you covered my rent, you even went with my mom to all her hospital checkups."

"If you keep doing this, I'm really going to get the wrong idea."

Desmond's voice was low.

"Beverly, don't overthink it."

"I just know it's hard for you on your own."

Beverly gave a small laugh.

"Are you this good to everyone who's having a hard time?"

The car went quiet for a few seconds.

Desmond didn't answer.

Beverly asked again:

"Then have you ever, even a little, liked me?"

Desmond was silent for a long time.

"Beverly, stop asking."

"There's no chance for us… I can't do wrong by Ramona."

Beverly said, muffled:

"Just answer my last question. Would you regret it?"

"Regret not meeting me sooner."

Desmond didn't speak for a long while.

Finally, he said:

"Yes."

I sat on the edge of the bed, looking down at the unlink button at the bottom of the screen.

I had heard it all now. I lowered my eyes and pressed it.

Desmond came out of the shower and wrapped his arms around me from behind, the way he always did.

"Ramona, I've been thinking."

"Tomorrow let's go put down the deposit on the place."

"That unit in Southgate. You always loved the floor-to-ceiling windows there, didn't you?"

Before, a few lines like that probably would have brought tears to my eyes.

Eight years. I'd waited for him too long.

He paused, as if choosing his words.

"Oh, and I was thinking we'd keep one of the rooms for Beverly to stay in."

"You know how it is with her family. It's not like she has a real home to go back to."

"That way you'd have company too, and she wouldn't waste money on rent. Once she gets married, she can move out."

"Let's hold off on the photo wall, too. Beverly says a full wall of cabinets is more practical."

"She's actually worried you'd mind."

"I told her, Ramona's the most generous person there is."

I watched the moonlight leaking through the gap in the curtains, and suddenly I smiled.

I lifted his arm off my waist.

"Sure."

Desmond let out a breath of relief.

Before long, his even breathing settled behind me.

At three in the morning, I dragged my suitcase out the door.

By the time Desmond woke, it was nine.

He reached toward the space beside him and found only cold sheets.

Half the closet was empty.

No breakfast in the kitchen.

On the shoe cabinet, only a spare key was left.

That was when the panic hit him. He called me at once.

Phone off.

His texts all bounced back with red exclamation marks.

His fingers shaking, Desmond called the head nurse of my department.

"Nurse Vaughn, did Ramona come in today? She had a little spat with me…"

The head nurse sounded more surprised than he did.

"A spat?"

"Ramona finished her exit paperwork last night."

Desmond's voice went tight. "Quit? And gone where?"

"Back home, to the city hospital there."

The head nurse paused.

"She said she probably won't be coming back to this city."

"Aren't you her boyfriend?"

"She really didn't tell you any of this?"